From the Archives: A Man of Mercy

27 Sunday Nov 2016

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Advent, Christmas, Mercy

Tags

Advent, Faith, Forgiveness is a Miracle, Jason Gray, Jesus, Joseph, Love, Man of Mercy, Mercy, Year of Mercy

With the Jubilee Year of Mercy ending last Sunday and the season of Advent beginning today, I thought I would resurrect this post from December of 2013. As we begin preparing ourselves for the birth of Jesus, the following perspective of what might have been going through Joseph’s mind and heart in the days before that blessed event serves perfectly to bridge the gap between the Year of Mercy and Advent. In his song Forgiveness is a Miracle (A Song for Joseph), Jason Gray paints for us a profound example of the mercy that was offered by Joseph, and, in the last verse, gives us insight into the divine wisdom of God.

When I originally posted this I did not include a link to the lyric video of the song. I am including it here Forgiveness is a Miracle (A Song for Joseph) so you can actually hear the song and feel the meaning within. I hope you enjoy it and that it helps you prepare your heart to be offered as a gift to our Lord on His birthday. Let me know what you think.

God bless you and may this be your best Advent ever!

A Man of Mercy (Reprinted from 5 December 2013)

About this time last year I was listening to a new CD I had purchased by my new favorite singer/songwriter, Jason Gray. The CD is called Christmas Stories: Repeat the Sounding Joy. One particular song on it, “Forgiveness Is A Miracle (A Song For Joseph)”, caught my attention because it was so different from any other Christmas song I had ever heard. Plus, its subject was something which I had never considered: what was going through Joseph’s mind and heart prior to, and during, his wife giving birth to not his son, but Jesus, the Son of God?

I discovered that Jason Gray had written an article for The Rabbit Room describing the story behind the song and he explores this difficult situation in which Joseph found himself. I have re-posted his article below and included a link to The Rabbit Room’s website. I hope you find it as thought provoking as I did.

http://www.rabbitroom.com/2012/10/the-story-behind-forgiveness-is-a-miracle/

The Story Behind “Forgiveness Is a Miracle”

by Jason Gray on October 16, 2012

As I approached writing songs for each of the characters in the Christmas story, I felt particularly protective of Joseph, who I think sometimes doesn’t get the attention he’s due. At the very least I know that I’ve been guilty of not really “seeing” him for the remarkable man that he was, and I wanted to amend that. I enlisted my friend Andy Gullahorn, one of the most masterful storytellers I know, to explore a particular moment in Joseph’s story with me.

Taking my cue from Frederick Buechner’s book, “Peculiar Treasures,” in which he breathes new life into biblical characters who have grown so familiar to us that we no longer experience them as real human beings, I hoped to recapture some of the humanity of the people in the Christmas narrative. It was also important to me to try and write songs that were relevant beyond the four weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas day. I wanted to tell timeless human stories, and with Joseph we have the makings of just that with a love triangle, a question of revenge or forgiveness, and the age old drama of fathers and sons.

As I read his part in the narrative, I found that more than just a foster parent without much to do (as he was often relegated to in my mind), Joseph is revealed as a man after God’s own heart. Faced not only with the news that his fiancée is pregnant, but also with her incredulous story of how it was God’s doing, Joseph’s character is tested and laid out for all of us to see. What will he do? Will he hurt the one who has hurt him? Will he forgive? This is his moment, and all of history waits and watches in wonder.

There are few things more painful than the betrayal and rejection by the one you love most, so we know it must have deeply wounded him—shattering the dreams he may have had of a future with the girl he loved. Pain is like a lightning bolt striking with a violent energy that can’t be held in the human heart for long. It looks for a way out. The way it usually passes through us is in the all too common progression of hurt turning into anger and then into vengeance. Unless the miracle of forgiveness takes place in a person’s heart to absorb it, the pain we experience will pass through us and be visited upon others.

There is debate as to whether it was within Joseph’s power to have her stoned—while Jewish custom might have allowed it, Roman rule did not. However, if not to her body, we know he still could have done violence to her reputation and her heart. But I believe that Joseph did the hard work of bringing his pain to God rather than letting it pass through him, and that God graced him with the miracle of forgiveness. The narrative tells us he was a “godly man” and that instead of doing her harm, “he decided to dismiss her quietly” so that she wouldn’t be publicly shamed. He took the full force of the blow and–acting as the husband he might have been–became a covering over her supposed sin.

It’s hard for us to experience the tension in Joseph’s story since, as the reader, we know from the start that she isn’t guilty of what he naturally supposes and that God is up to something beautiful that the world has never seen before. But to see Joseph for who he is, I have to remember that he couldn’t know these things in real time. It was only after he had given himself to the work of forgiveness that the angel appeared to him in a dream to tell him that what Mary had said was true after all, and that he should marry her.

It occurred to me that perhaps this is where Joseph’s heart was proven—if not to God who already knew his heart, then perhaps to himself. (I haven’t met a man yet who isn’t daunted by the responsibility of being a father, let alone a father to the Son of God. Maybe this was a test to reveal to Joseph what kind of man he could be.) In this moment he is found to be a man of mercy, which I imagine to be just the kind of man that God was looking for to be the earthly father of his son Jesus. In a way, we see that Joseph carries in his heart the same world changing power of forgiveness that Mary carried in her womb.

It’s also meaningful to me to think of how Joseph forgiving Mary is part of the story that leads to the birth of the savior in whom Joseph would find forgiveness for his own sins. Perhaps it’s the narrative form of Jesus’ teaching that as we forgive we find ourselves forgiven.

As we wrote the song, it was good to be reminded that forgiveness is a kind of miracle. I could be wrong, but I’m not sure that we can muster up forgiveness on our own. It seems to me to be a supernatural force of renewal that we participate in as we point our hearts toward it, pray for it, and make room for it in our lives, but that ultimately we receive it as a gift from God, in his due time.

Forgiveness Is A Miracle (A Song For Joseph)

Jason Gray / Andy Gullahorn

from Christmas Stories: Repeat the Sounding Joy

Love can make a soul come alive

Love can draw a dream out of the darkness

And blow every door open wide

But love can leave you broken hearted

Did she dare to look you in the eye

Did her betrayal leave you raging?

Did you let her see you cry

When she said the child was not your baby?

Pain can turn to anger then to vengeance

It happens time and again

Even in the best of men

It takes a miracle to save us

When love is like an open wound

There’s no way to stop the bleeding

Did you lose sleep over what to do?

Between what’s just and what brings healing

Pain can be a road to find compassion

When we don’t understand, and bring a better end

It takes a miracle to show us

Forgiveness is a miracle

A miracle

And a miracle can change your world

Forgiveness is a miracle

An angel in a dream spoke into your darkest night

So you trusted in the Lord and you took her as your wife

But the forgiveness that you gave would be given back to you

Because you carried in your heart what she was holding in her womb

Love was in a crowded barn

There you were beside her kneeling

You held it in your arms

As the miracle started breathing

Forgiveness is the miracle

The miracle

And a miracle will change your world

Forgiveness is the miracle

The miracle

A miracle will save the world

Forgiveness is the miracle

Blessed Joseph

Your heart is proven

And through you the Kingdom has come

For God delights in a man of mercy

And has found an earthly father for his son

(From the Archives: A Man of Mercy was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

©2016 Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Reposting and sharing of material in its full and original content is permitted, provided that full and clear credit is given to the author(s) and Reflections of a Lay Catholic.

The Jubilee Year of Mercy: The Corporal Works of Mercy

18 Friday Nov 2016

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Catechism, Catholic Moral Teaching, Charity, Corporal Works of Mercy, Hope, Love, Mercy

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Burying the Dead, Catholic Catechism, Charity, Clothing the Naked, Corporal Works of Mercy, Feeding the Hungry, Giving Drink to the Thirsty, Harboring the Homeless, Hope, Kindness, Know Mercy Show Mercy, Love, Mercy, Ransoming the Captive, Visiting the Sick

When I posted The Jubilee Year of Mercy – The Basics in March, I promised to post more about mercy, what it is and how we can apply it in our lives. With the Year of Mercy ending this Sunday, November 20^th, on the Solemnity of Christ the King, I’m running out of time. Yes, I procrastinated, but it took a while to understand the concept of mercy well enough to feel comfortable relating it to you.

Specifically, I want to delve into what we call the Corporal and the Spiritual Works of Mercy. To keep the post short enough, I will break them into two posts.

Corporal Works of Mercy: Meeting the physical needs of others

“The works of mercy are charitable actions by which we come to the aid of our neighbor in his spiritual and bodily necessities….Among all these, giving alms to the poor is one of the chief witnesses to fraternal charity: it is also a work of justice pleasing to God.” (CCC 2447) The corporal works of mercy include: feeding the hungry; giving drink to the thirsty; clothing the naked; harboring the homeless; visiting the sick; ransoming the captive; and burying the dead.

Feeding the Hungry

“The generous shall be blessed, for they share their food with the poor.” Proverbs 22:9 (NAB)

This corporal work of mercy is nearly self-explanatory. We all know that most communities have a food pantry or soup kitchen that provides meals to those who do not have the means to buy their own food. Many people volunteer to serve food. Some organize food drives. And others who can’t find the time to volunteer donate food to those who do.

But, there are other ways to feed the hungry which often go overlooked. Do you know a person who is unable to cook a meal for themselves or their family? Perhaps you could prepare a meal and deliver it to them. Parents and spouses, in a sense, are offering a work of mercy by working and sacrificing to earn money to provide and prepare healthy meals for their families. It’s not about the kind or amount of food, but the love that goes into providing it. Give your heart. Offer your works of mercy out of love for others.

Give Drink to the Thirsty

“Whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst; the water that I shall give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” – John 4:14 (NAB)

Fortunately, most of us don’t have to worry about having enough clean water to drink. That’s not true in most of the rest of the world. Even in our own country the urban homeless and those in poverty stricken areas often have too little fresh drinking water.

With this corporal work of mercy, however, we need to think beyond the literal into the figurative aspect of spiritual thirst. How many of us thirst for affirmation, for compassion, to be welcomed and understood? How many children thirst for attention and closeness from their working parents who barely have the time to devote to them? How many elderly are lonely for someone with whom they can talk? Sometimes the merciful “drink” we give to others is simply respect, dignity and kindness.

Clothe the Naked

“He said to them in reply, ‘Whoever has two tunics should share with the person who has none.’” Luke 3:11 (NAB)

If we look around we can see that many people in our communities struggle to adequately clothe themselves and their families. This is especially true during the harshness of winter. Clothing the naked is perhaps the easiest of the works of mercy to apply in our lives. There are many outlets, such as St. Vincent de Paul and The Salvation Army, where we can deposit our no longer wanted clothing for distribution to those who do need it. Similar to Feeding the Hungry, we should not be afraid to give the good stuff.

We can clothe the naked in a figurative sense as well. Consider those who have wronged us in some way and are seeking forgiveness – they are laying their souls bare to receive our forgiveness. We need to clothe their “nakedness” by listening to their heart-felt pleas and restoring their dignity with compassion. When we do this we are clothing Jesus. Our actions transform us by opening us up to receive the grace of God.

Harbor the Homeless

“Jesus answered him, ‘Foxes have dens and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to rest his head.’” Luke 9:58 (NAB)

This is a tough one. In today’s society, most of us would be foolish and rightfully afraid to open our homes to strangers. So, how do we harbor the homeless? Perhaps the easiest way is to support, through monetary contributions and volunteering our time, those organizations which specialize in providing shelter to the homeless. Another way is to volunteer with an organization that improves people’s living conditions by repairing their homes. By helping to shelter the homeless we are being Christ to those whom we “harbor”. And, because we are Christian, we are obligated to see Christ in them. We are helping “The Son of Man” find a place to “rest His head.” By being merciful we are introducing them to Jesus.

Visit the Sick

“I was sick and you visited me.” Matthew 25:36 (NAB)

This corporal work of mercy is often misunderstood. Comforting the sick is more the intent. It’s more than visiting the infirmed just to say you did. Instead, it’s about reaching out and bringing relief to those who need help. Whether the person is physically ill or spiritually ailing from isolation or loneliness, a visit borne out of love can be healing. For many, being present and praying with them can heal their soul. Unlike children who can be comforted with a “get-well” toy, the best remedy for adult illness is the gift of a loving personal encounter. A visit to the sick is more than sharing their personal space, it’s sharing their emotional space and bringing love and dignity into it.

Ransom the Captive

“Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:28 (NAB)

In the early Church, Christians frequently ransomed fellow Christians being held captive in prisons or in slavery by taking their place. They volunteered their own captivity so that another may have freedom. We don’t see this anymore and I don’t think we could do it if we wanted to. So, we have to view this work of mercy in a figurative sense. In doing so, it is easy to see that we are all held captive in one way or another: to addictions and self-defeating habits; to the stranglehold of money and possessions; to guilt, fear, and failure; to abusive relationships; to poverty; and to the stigma of past sins. Many things control us. How do we help others to be liberated from their captivity?

The starting place is to have a loving desire to help another get out of their pit, to break their chains. Some “prisoners” may need expert help, but, for many, the simple effort of helping one get back on their feet by being loving and encouraging is all it takes to initiate their liberty. Examples include: befriending someone who is alone in the world; and rescuing children who are captive in their environments by offering them a way out through mentoring programs. Ransoming the captive is using our time, talent and treasure to redeem those who are being held in their individual prisons. We need to remember that Jesus’ death on the cross ransomed us from eternal isolation from God.

Bury the Dead

“Give your gift to all the living, and do not withhold your kindness from the dead.” Sirach 7:33 (NAB)

As Catholics, we confirm our beliefs about the dead every time we profess in our Creed that we believe in the resurrection of the body. This belief drives our funeral rites which, even in death, are outward signs of honoring the dignity of a person. Our Catechism explains this work of mercy beautifully: “The bodies of the dead must be treated with respect and charity, in faith and hope of the Resurrection….it honors the children of God who are temples of the Holy Spirit.” (CCC2300)

Before I became Catholic I dreaded funerals. They were uncomfortable events to say the least. But, now, attending a funeral with the understanding that it is an opportunity to offer mercy, I am not only able, but have a desire to pay my respects to the memory of the deceased and to offer consolation to the mourning family. And, putting everything in the context of mercy helps me to deal with my own sorrow.

The beauty about this act of mercy is not having to wait for someone you know to die. In the last couple years, I have attended three funeral masses for people whom I didn’t even know. They were members of my parish community and, in a sense, family. My prayers joined the prayers of so many others in an expression of faith in the Resurrection and the hope that the faithful departed were on their way to eternal life.

There are other ways to live this act of mercy. Sadly, the cost of a funeral is beyond the means of many in our society today. Helping the family cover the cost of a funeral is something communities or parishes can do by setting up fund collections. Another is to provide food for the post-funeral gathering to enable family and friends to continue their consolation and sharing of memories.

One final thought: our Lord was given a decent burial. The least we can do is honor Him by doing the same for others.

Just because the Year of Mercy is coming to an end doesn’t mean we stop being merciful. The need for mercy is constant and more critical than we can imagine. And, though we look outward towards those who need our mercy, we can never lose sight that we all need mercy in our own lives. The mercy we give comes from God the Father. Likewise, the mercy we receive from our neighbors, loved ones, and even strangers, also comes from God the Father. I challenge you to consider how you can be more merciful in your life. Begin today.

Stay tuned for my next post on the Spiritual Works of Mercy!

“Lord God, help me to always recognize and be grateful for the mercy you shower upon me. To show my gratitude, please allow me to be your hands, feet and heart by being merciful to others. Amen.”

(The Jubilee Year of Mercy – Corporal Works of Mercy was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

The Big Stuff

06 Sunday Nov 2016

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Faith

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Big Stuff, Body of Christ, Eucarist, Faith, Friendship, God, Grace, Jesus, Love, Marriage, Mass, Thanksgiving

I don’t know if it’s just the time of year, or the change in the weather, or some straggling ragweed still in the air, but I felt puny all last week. I decided to take Friday off and I made a 9:15 a.m. appointment to see my doctor. On Thursday night before bed I told my wife that I was looking forward to sleeping in an extra hour or two. Then she asked me if I would like to go to 7:30 a.m. mass with her, something I never get to do because of my work hours. I replied I would be glad to, but then thought to myself I need to change that “hour or two” of extra sleep to just one hour.

Melinda woke before me on Friday morning and was already down stairs when I rolled out of bed. We met up after I showered and dressed and, unlike every normal work day, I had a chance to give her a big hug and good morning kiss. I growled, “I love you”, in my broken voice that was about two octaves lower than normal. Melinda replied, “You don’t sound too good!”, to which I said, “I feel great, I got an extra hour of sleep and I’m getting to hug you this morning. My day is starting off fabulously!” She responded, “Boy, it just takes little stuff to get you feeling good.” I didn’t tell her but I thought, “No, darling, this isn’t little stuff. This is big stuff. This is why I decided I’m going to retire. These little moments of intimacy are the big reward. They’re what makes life worth living.”

We went to mass and got there a couple minutes late. I seldom get to go to weekday masses and always get a little confused with the slightly abbreviated version as compared to the usual Sunday mass. In one way I miss the hymns (the people around me probably didn’t miss my singing!) but then without them it gets me to the Celebration of the Eucharist that much quicker. Receiving Holy Communion is always the high point of my day. As I accepted the Blessed Sacrament I marveled at how that one little round disk, which just a few moments earlier was simply a wafer of bread, can, with its transformation, transform one’s whole life. And, then, with a glance towards the crucifix which hung above the altar, I thought, “That’s not just a little round wafer of bread, no, that’s BIG stuff! Bigger than BIG! It is truly the body of Christ!” Upon kneeling back at my pew I gave thanks to Jesus for the unity with Him, for His nourishing my spirit, for His forgiveness of my sins and for the grace to avoid sinning, and for giving me the grace to listen to the Holy Spirit and let it fill my heart with love. Yeah, that’s real big stuff. It’s what makes life worth living.

Later that afternoon, I had the opportunity to join a friend to talk about our faith. We meet weekly to share with each other how our prayer life has been going over the last week, what we’ve been doing to study and grow our faith, and what actions we have taken to spread the word of God or bring Christ to others. We’ve found that this weekly exercise helps us hold each other accountable so that we don’t get lazy in our faith. It only takes an hour. To some it may seem like small talk, but to me it’s that man to man time when we can be honest with each other and we know that we can trust the other to help keep us on the right path. More big stuff. And, more of what makes life worth living.

I love the big stuff. How about you? What’s your big stuff?

“Heavenly Father, thank you for opening my eyes to the big stuff in life and helping me decide to turn away from the things that have kept me from the big stuff. As I move into retirement I pray that I can always keep the big stuff the big stuff. But, Lord, I know I will lose focus from time to time and I pray you will gently bring me back. Amen.”

(The Big Stuff was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic.)

In Which Season Is Your Marriage?

02 Wednesday Nov 2016

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Marriage

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Four Seasons of Marriage, God, Grace, Love, Marriage, Romance, vocation, Worldwide Marriage Encounter, WWME

On October 25^th, my wife and I took time to spend the day together at a Worldwide Marriage Encounter event. The event, affectionately dubbed the Day of Romance, was attended by nearly 40 couples who were consciously trying to turn their good marriages into great marriages.

The program for the day was inspired by the book The Four Seasons of Marriage by Gary Chapman. The four seasons depict the different stages through which married couples either thrive or suffer, and the transition periods between them. The program was presented by four volunteer couples who gave witnesses of periods in their marriages when they were in one of these seasons.

Fall

The first season presented was “Fall”, a cooling period that may follow a time that was filled with much fun and intense closeness but which is beginning to wane. Couples may experience uncertainty about where their marriage is heading and they hope the relationship will get better on its own. But, if they choose to make no extra effort to improve intimacy and understanding, the relationship can often slide into “Winter”.

Winter

The “Winter” season is often a “Fall” that didn’t get turned around. Instead, it gets colder and causes severe lack of intimacy and feelings of aloneness between the couple. The previous uncertainty becomes reality. Lack of communication and understanding of each other’s feelings compounds the situation. If enough love and effort isn’t devoted to the relationship during this season, the marriage will suffer.

Neither “Fall” nor “Winter” is where we want to be. But, if we find ourselves there, we can rejuvenate our marriage through intentional effort allowing us to emerge with our relationship stronger than it was before.

Spring

“Spring” is that season when the relationship is blooming, the uncertainty is diminishing and there is hope in the air. As partners, intimacy is growing; doubt is being replaced with optimism and trust; and bitterness with love and gratitude. This change in attitude allows husband and wife to begin enjoying each other again.

Summer

“Summer” is the season we strive for. It’s when we are at our closest. We have fun, we enjoy being with each other, our positive attitudes are shining, and love is vibrantly alive. It’s during this summertime of our marriage when other couples take notice and want some of what we have.

As the Day of Romance came to a close I noticed the many smiles, hugs, and hand-holding. There was a lot of summertime in that room. The attitudes were contagious and I thought how great it would be if that essence could be bottled and gifted to couples who struggle.

Since that day, I have pondered what it is that makes these marriages so good? I’ve decided that good marriages happen independently of the age of the couple or how many anniversaries they’ve had. I believe the secret is in each husband and wife opening their hearts to God’s Word. They accept that their marriage is a God-given vocation and their love drives them to live up to God’s expectations. As such, it appears they are taking the hard road, diligently working to make the most of their marriage. They intentionally find uncommon ways, perhaps romantically but not necessarily so, to express their love verbally and in their actions. They are giving their all to their relationship and they are receiving their spouse’s all.

In contrast, they are doing the opposite of many married couples who don’t see their relationship as a God-given vocation. Through laziness and wrong expectations, sadly, these couples don’t put their hearts into helping each other thrive. It appears they are taking the easy way out by minimizing marriage and doing as little as they can to get by instead of maximizing it. They are selfishly concerned about their own happiness instead of focusing on that of their spouse.

The truth is, ironically, that those who do accept marriage as a God-given vocation actually have the easy road, and the others have the hard road. For it is God’s grace bestowed on the former, that enables them to easily do the hard work for the benefit of their partners. Those who do the least possible have a perpetual struggle to keep their marriages afloat because they lack the buoyancy of God’s grace.

I realized that bottling the positive attitudes of successful couples, even if it was possible, would be doing no favors for those who take their marriage for granted. There simply is no substitute for the love, hard work and dedication, which, by its own virtue, receives the supernatural assistance of God’s grace to lift each other up by placing the other’s physical, emotional and spiritual needs ahead of one’s own.

(In Which Season Is Your Marriage? was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)