Ask and You Shall Receive

28 Saturday May 2022

Tags

Charity, God-moments, Grace, John 16:23-28, Love, Prayer

(A reflection on the Gospel of John 16:23-28)

One night a week or so ago I didn’t sleep well and I woke up groggy and too late to go to 7:30 morning mass. In fact, I barely had time to get my act together and make it to 9:00 mass at another parish. I didn’t have time for my morning meditation and, because of the slew of errands i I had to run during the day, I knew I wouldn’t be able to fit it in until my Adoration hour that evening. So, my resolution for the day was the standard I use in situations like this: “Heavenly Father, grant me the grace to recognize and act on the opportunities you present to me today to be charitable to others. I ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

My first stop after leaving mass was the grocery store. As I pulled into the parking lot the skies opened up and it began to pour down rain. I decided to wait it out and lay my seat back and take a little nap until it stopped raining. I checked the clock to see what time it was and then closed my eyes. Three minutes later, just as I was about to doze off, I heard a knocking on my window. There, looking me in the eyes with her nose almost touching the glass, with either rain or tears running down her cheeks, was a young woman asking, “Sir, my car won’t start, would you mind giving me a jump?”

I immediately replied, “I don’t have any jumper cables” (which was the truth), to which she responded, “I do!”. I couldn’t very well say we should wait until it stops raining since she was already soaked to the bone, so I agreed to help her.

The shopping cart corral was between her car and mine so I pulled out and maneuvered my truck close to her little sedan. By the time I got my hood opened I was already sopping wet. The young woman pulled her jumper cables out of her back seat and they were the shortest set of cables I’d ever seen, only about three feet long and they wouldn’t reach my battery. I repositioned closer to her car, reopened the hood and connected the cables, which barely reached, and soon we had her car started. As I disconnected the cables and closed the hood, she politely told me, “Thank you.”

I got back in my truck and pulled back into my parking spot. As I watched her pull away I realized the extent of my sogginess. I started to complain when it hit me that I had received exactly what I’d asked for, a chance to be charitable to someone else. I looked upwards and, with a chuckle, prayed, “Lord, you didn’t waste any time, did you!” In my imagination I could hear God, with a chuckle in His voice saying, “You asked for it so I gave it to you. Thank you, my son”, to which I replied, “You’re welcome….and thank You!”

This memory came back to me as I read today’s scripture. In today’s Gospel, John 16:23-28, Jesus tells us that “whatever you ask the Father in my name He will give it to you….ask and you will receive so that your joy will be complete.” This was nearly the last thing Jesus said to His disciples before He was arrested. It was His last request to His friends. He had told them He was going away but He would send the Advocate to be with them in His absence. He wanted them to know that He wasn’t leaving them alone and if they trusted in Him they would still find joy no matter what.

Jesus wants us to trust Him, too. He wants us to know that His Spirit is with us all the time and all that we have to do is call upon Him and ask Him for what we need. We please Him immensely when our request is for something good, something that is in line with making us like Him, something that leads us toward holiness.

If our request is for something that is not good, we might get what we ask for or we might not. We might get it to teach us a lesson, or we might not get it because we’ve sold ourself short and He’ll give us something even better. The important thing is to ask Him, to include Him in our daily lives, to trust that His generosity will provide the best for us and that it will complete our joy.

How often do you ask Him for help?

“Lord Jesus, I know that I don’t ask You for Your help nearly enough. You’ve told me that, without You, I can do nothing. I need to take that to heart and spend more time asking You for the good things in life like: loving my family and neighbors as they deserve to be loved, being more virtuous, and loving You more dearly by spending quality time with You in prayer. Come, Holy Spirit! Amen.”

(Ask and You Shall Receive was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

©2013-2022 Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Reposting and sharing of material in its full and original content is permitted, provided that full and clear credit is given to the author(s) and Reflections of a Lay Catholic.

Random Musings on a Spring Morning

18 Monday Apr 2022

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Grace and Mercy

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Compost, Family, Gardening, Good Soil, Hope, Love, Parable of the Sower

My dear friend, Bob, and I were sharing stories a few evenings ago, both aware of how God has abundantly blessed us with family and friends. Like me, Bob has been graced with the gift of tears and as we talked those began to well up and leak out. It’s often difficult to express how it feels to be on the receiving end of Christ’s infinite love and mercy, especially when we don’t feel we deserve it. I can’t think of a better reason for tears of joy to be shared among friends. The next morning, Bob sent me the following reflection that expressed that feeling perfectly. I asked, and he consented to let me share it with you on Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Thank you, Bob.

Random Musings on a Spring Morning, by Bob Magness

It’s been a bit of a surreal morning, enjoying a cup of coffee thinking about the day ahead and reflecting on the day that was. The sun was poking through the trees and for the first time in a long time there was dew on the ground- not frost! And my thoughts turned green. Green with the thoughts of leaves budding from the trees… Green with the spring season… but mostly Green with the thoughts of the garden and the vegetable season ahead. I like gardening. I like the smell of soil and how it feels in your hands. I like the promise of hope from putting that seed into that soil. Hope that it sprouts and hope that it produces. Hope is a pretty good thing.

I got up to fill the coffee cup and clean the coffee pot. And in doing so, I put the coffee grounds into the compost bin. Yeah, I compost. But it’s a lazy man’s compost. It basically consists of coffee grounds and eggshells and whatever vegetable scraps we happen to produce throughout the week. And then this goes into a pile behind the shed. The unwanted, the scraps, the not pretty parts. It’s amazing how much is generated- all that stuff you’d just as soon forget about – that you don’t want anyone to see. So, into a pile it goes and thru the magic of Heaven and Earth a robust soil is created. And it is magic especially if you garden- because it’s almost alchemy in its ability to turn that discarded rubbish into a black gold.

My thoughts turned to Jesus’ Parable of the Sower and Seeds and how some of the seeds fall on rocky ground and some of the seeds get mixed in with weeds and of course the preferred case where the seeds fall on fertile ground. There’s probably a reason most people remember this parable even if they can’t remember the Book or Chapter or Verse. It’s a great analogy and lesson that leads to deep conversation about whether you are the sower or the seed and how your perception transitions depending on where you are in that particular moment in time. It occurs to me that no one ever talks about the terrain in which those seeds fall. Perhaps we think that the terrain is static and unable to change.

I remember hiking and seeing trees growing through the tiniest of cracks on a nothing but rock-faced landscape of a mountainside. And I thought about how that seed was able to penetrate even the tiniest of cracks and even thrive in that rock. And once in that tiny crack it’s able to open that rock and allow more soil which invites more seeds and increases that crack…a vicious cycle if you’re a rock. I began to think about glaciers and their ability to flatten mountains and grind those rocks into sand and how this helps the plants extract the valuable mineral content. And again, I thought of Christ’s word and God’s ability to change anything. But mostly I was thinking about that tree on the side of the mountain. I concluded that Hope is the reason it’s holding on to that rock face.

And I returned to my compost and what that compost has been able to do to the native, neglected, heavy clay soil in which my garden started all those years ago. The biology that happens in that compost pile is worth noting – fungi and mold start the process. Then worms and insects move in to break down that material into something that is not only usable but beneficial. Biology- more things that people don’t want to talk about and endure but it’s part of that magic. It’s not a quick process, it can seem like a glacier. Maybe it would proceed more quickly if I followed the rules or did it better. Every now and then I’ll turn the pile to mix but mostly it just sits there. When it’s ready, I add to the existing garden bed and plant. The seeds and plants flourish; and everyone comments how great the garden looks and how good those fruits and vegetables taste. All from the discarded rubbish- those kitchen scraps and eggshells and coffee grounds and how they became part of my garden.

All the unspoken things from earlier times… and my mind reflected on all those things I would rather not talk about. Those scraps of bad actions and broken eggshells of worse ideas. Like that lazy compost pile behind the shed, and what is returned has an amazing ability to amend the poor and rocky soil of my heart. And somehow that pile produced a family garden. Not through any work of my hand, but in giving that mess to Christ. A garden. Beauty beyond measure. Pride beyond words.

And there are still some thistle seeds present- always present. I like to blame the finches but somewhere I know the truth.

And there are still rocks in that garden.

But there’s hope that the seeds sprout and take root and produce fruit and then yet more seeds.

And hope is a pretty good thing.

(Random Musings on a Spring Morning was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Peace in Knowing the Meaning of Easter

18 Monday Apr 2022

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Faith

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

Col 3:1-4, Easter, Faith, Hope, Love, Peace, Resurrection

(Editor’s note: In the original posting yesterday, the link to the included homily broadcast did not work. It has been corrected.)

Resurrection of Christ, Noel Coypel, c. 1700

Happy Easter, everyone! Christ is risen today! Alleluia!

It’s been a beautiful day here in Southwest Ohio. A perfect day to celebrate and be joyful. It didn’t begin that way for me, though. I caught my annual springtime cold on Thursday and it’s steadily worsened. I did go to the Mass of the Lord’s Supper Thursday evening and coughed and sneezed my way through it. And, as my cold got worse overnight, I knew better than to go to the Stations of the Cross and the Celebration of the Lord’s Passion on Good Friday, and I decided to skip going to the Easter Vigil Mass as well.

After a fitful night’s sleep I poured myself out of bed this morning and made it to 9:00 a.m. Mass. I managed to make it through with only a few coughs and no sneezes. But, between my head being stopped up and the additional noise from all the extra people, I didn’t understand a word of Father’s homily.

In resignation, I closed my eyes and repeated Simon Peter’s words from the Transfiguration, “It’s good that I am here”, and gave thanks for the opportunity to offer up my suffering and unite it to His cross.

As I stood to go up to communion I recalled the words from the second reading, Col 3:1-4, “Think of what is above, not of what is on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.” With each step forward I was drawn to the glory of Christ resurrected, and away from the fogginess I’d been experiencing all morning. By the time I reached the priest to receive the Eucharist, I felt an intense inner peace and knew I was smiling from ear to ear. As I walked back to my seat, letting the Body of Christ dissolve on my tongue, I looked upwards, still smiling, thinking of what is above, and I spied above the entrance doors to the church the Risen Christ on the cross with His arms spread wide in love. He was saying to me, “Your life is hidden here with Me.”

As I knelt back at my seat and said my prayer of thanksgiving after communion, that feeling stayed with me. I wasn’t focused on the way I felt, didn’t work to fend off a coughing fit or stifle a sneeze. I just focused on Jesus, thankful for the hope that my destiny will be with him. I knew that I will suffer things in my life much worse than a common cold, but in the end all of it will pale in comparison to the joy I will find when I find myself with Him.

I left Mass feeling pumped up spiritually yet drained physically, and still somewhat frustrated that I hadn’t heard well enough to understand Father’s homily. I felt a little cheated. Then, about two hours later, I received a message from a friend with a link to a homily from Fr. Ehli at the Cathedral of the Holy Spirit in Bismarck, North Dakota, where my friend’s daughter attends church. It was like the Holy Spirit heard my grumblings and blessed me with what was probably an even better homily on which to meditate. It hit home with me and I feel I need to share it with you here: Fr. Ehli’s homily. The homily begins at the 20:30 mark and ends at 31:30. I won’t give his message away except to say that, between it and my experience at Mass, knowing what’s in store at the end makes the getting there, even with springtime colds and other struggles, much more peaceful.

I pray that your Easter has been a joyful one, that your Hope has found new life knowing that Christ defeated death and He is holding a place for you. God bless you!

“Lord Jesus, You suffered and died for me and redeemed me of my sins. Your resurrection defeated death and gave the world hope that, by following You, we may also defeat death and live with you for all eternity. Thank you! Amen.”

Resolution: I desire to sow the seeds of this Word today by making a concrete resolution to live with more peace in the present moment.

(Peace in Knowing the Meaning of Easter was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Wanted: Saints in Heaven. Please Send Resume.

17 Tuesday Nov 2020

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Bible Reflections, Saints

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

1 Jn 4:10, Confession, Gratitude, Holiness, Hope, Interior Life, Lk 18:35-43, Lk 19:1-10, Love, Prayer, Ps 15:2-5, Reconciliation, Repentance, Rv 3:1-6, Rv 3:14-22, Saints, Zacchaeus

This last spring I applied for a job which I thought would be interesting, would lead me closer to Christ, and was in-line with my passion for helping others grow closer to our Lord. And, it offered full medical benefits at no cost to me! However, there were two downsides to the opportunity: first, that I would have to drive an hour each way to and from work (the cost of which would be offset by the savings on retiree medical insurance); and second, after being retired for three years I really didn’t want a full time job anyway.

After waiting the obligatory two weeks, I received a response thanking me for my interest but advising that my engineering degree and 36 years of engineering related management experience made me exceedingly over-qualified for the position. I felt neither rejected nor relieved at the response but, instead, looked at it as God saying that someone else needed the opportunity more than me. I was happy to let His will be done.

I thought about this as I read today’s Scripture (Rv 3:1-6, 14-22; Ps 15:2-5; 1 Jn 4:10; and Lk 19:1-10 NAB). I thought, “Every day I am adding one more experience, either good or bad, to my resume for the position of a Saint in heaven. When the day comes and it gets reviewed, will I be qualified or under qualified? (Thankfully, there is no such thing as being over qualified although we humans may often think we are!). How will my resume read? Will it be an affirmation of the requirements mentioned in today’s scripture?:

“Has my faith been alive or dead (Rv 3:1)? If it’s been alive, has it been on fire or has it been lukewarm at best (Rv 3:16)?

“Have I opened the door of my heart to the Holy Spirit and allowed Him to enter and form the interior life within me (Rv 3:20)?

“Do I hope for the victory and the right to sit next to Jesus on His throne (Rv 3:21)?

“Have I done what is right, and spoken the truth from the heart such that I can walk without blame (Ps 15:2)?

“Have I not harmed, defamed, or slandered a neighbor or friend (Ps 15:3)?

“Have I honored those who live a holy life, trying to live a holy life myself and steering away from the wickedness of the world in spite of the pressures to do otherwise (Ps 15:4)?

“Have I taken advantage of others financially and profited from it, or could I have been more generous in my charity (Ps 15:5)?

“Have I been grateful to God for His love and, out of love, sending me His Son for expiation of my sins (1 Jn 4:10)?

“Have I been grateful to God for all the love He has sent my way through my family and friends (1 Jn 4:11)?

“Have I lived in the present moment and been intentional about seeking Jesus through prayer (Lk 19:3-4)?

“Have I received Jesus with joy when He hears me, answers my prayers, and when I feel His presence (Lk 19:6)?

“Have I been grateful for all my possessions, especially all the graces the Lord has bestowed on me (Lk 19:8)?

“Have I confessed my sins when I know I’ve done wrong, and have I repented to do right (Lk 19:8)?”

Wow! Those are some exacting job requirements! And, I know it’s not all of them. Maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t get that job after all because I think I need to spend my retirement creating some new and positive experiences and tweaking the final edition of my resume.

The good news is that each of us already has an office in heaven with our name on the door just waiting for us to occupy it. It is not beyond our reach to become qualified for the position. The benefits will certainly make the drive worthwhile!

How will your resume read?

“Loving Father, as the blind man in yesterday’s Gospel (Lk 18:35-43), I pray to be able to ‘see’ – that is to grow in faith so that I may love You more clearly and more dearly; for the grace to live by Your commandments; and to never lose Hope that I may one day sit with You on Your throne. Amen.”

(Wanted: Saints in Heaven. Please Send Resume. was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

©2013-2020 Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Reposting and sharing of material in its full and original content is permitted, provided that full and clear credit is given to the author(s) and Reflections of a Lay Catholic.

I Love Because of You

09 Friday Oct 2020

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Love, Road Trips

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

Fly Fishing, Grace, Love, Mercy

16″ Rainbow trout caught on a #22 midge and released

Last week I went for a little drive. From Cincinnati to Rapid City, South Dakota and back. Just 1,225 miles each way. I visited family and took the opportunity to do a little fly fishing in the Black Hills. I caught a few trout including this 16 inch Rainbow on a #22 Midge on what was going to be my last cast of the day.

The Black Hills are always stunningly beautiful, and with the fall foliage contrasting with the deep blue of the sky, they are even more so this time of year.

Upper Rapid Creek in the South Dakota Black Hills

But, to get to the Black Hills of South Dakota, I had to traverse from east to west the entire state of Iowa. It is difficult to describe the corn fields of Iowa with quite the same picturesque enthusiasm. I’m not saying corn isn’t beautiful in its own way, but 300 miles of it got a little boring.

Somewhere just west of Davenport, I slid in Jerry Jeff Walker’s CD, It’s About Time, a good sing along album, to break the monotony. Track 3 is titled Because of You, a love song to his wife about how their loving relationship changed his life. I thought about that a bit and transferred the idea to how our lives change when we turn to and have a loving relationship with Christ. And, by the time I made it to Sioux City, I had four verses and a chorus written to that tune (there are only three verses in the original song). I’m sharing them with you here. Thank you, Jerry Jeff, for the tune, and thank You, Lord, for the love You give and for the inspiration to write this.

I Love Because of You – Lyrics by Jerry Robinson

I never knew Your love, Lord, all those years ago,
I turned my back on You, and I chose to go alone.
But when I hit the bottom
Some friends brought me to You,
And everything I love now,
I love because of You.

You knew I needed love, Lord, so You gave to me my wife,
A partner for the good and hard times in my life.
You gave us beautiful daughters,
Sons, and grandkids, too,
And everyone I love now,
I love because of You

Chorus
Jesus, You have loved me for all my life,
Your grace and mercy are a love that’s true,
So, I want to thank You
And give my loving heart to You
‘Cause everything I love in life
I love because of You.

There’re a lot of people, Lord, who struggle every day,
There’re hungry and there’re homeless, and those who’ve lost their way.
You say to love our neighbor
‘Cause that’s what good folks do.
So, everyone I love now,
I love because of You.

Jesus, You have loved me for all my life,
Your grace and mercy are a love that’s true,
So, I want to thank You
And give my loving heart to You
‘Cause everything I love in life
I love because of You.

There’s no greater love, Lord, than what You did for me,
You sacrificed Your own life on a cross on Calvary.
Yet, You still sustain me
With Your blood and body, too,
And everything I love now
I love because of You.

(I Love Because of You was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Recognizing Jesus

14 Tuesday Apr 2020

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Bible Reflections, Daily 100

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

Jesus, Jn 20:11-18, Love, Mary of Magdela, Mercy

(A reflection on Jn 20:11-18)

As she wept at His tomb, Mary of Magdela encountered Jesus but didn’t recognize Him until He spoke to her compassionately, saying, “Mary, stop holding on to Me”. Then, obeying her teacher, Mary told the disciples with pure joy, “I have seen the Lord!”

I can’t see Jesus face to face in this life. But, I know He’s present every moment of my day. He sends His love to me through Holy Scripture and through my wife, children, friends and many of life’s circumstances. I need to better recognize Him and live such that others may recognize Him in me.

“Lord Jesus, today I resolve to recognize the kindness of others as Your love poured out through them. And, I resolve to be the instrument through whom your love and mercy may touch others. Amen.”

(Recognizing Jesus was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Virtue: A Casualty of a Secular Culture

11 Wednesday Dec 2019

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Virtue

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Book of Virtues, Cardinal Virtues, Charity, Faith, Fortitude, Hope, Justice, Love, Prudence, Romans 15:4-5, Temperance, Theoligical Virtues, Virtue

The Four Cardinal Virtues – The Strasbourg Cathedral, 13th Century

Several years ago, say around 1994, my daughter, Lisa, who was seven or eight years old at the time, did something she shouldn’t have done (today, I don’t even remember what it was) and I caught her at it. When confronted, she lied to me to try to keep from getting in trouble. So, to teach her a lesson about honesty, I had her read a story from William J. Bennett’s book, The Book of Virtues, and then write me a letter telling me what she learned and why it was important not to lie.

The story I had her read was, Matilda Who Told Lies, and Was Burned to Death by British writer, historian, and Catholic, Hilaire Belloc, which is sort of a “Boy Who Cried Wolf” kind of tale. The title sounds harsh but the story is actually more tame. Young Matilda had, it seemed, a tendency to lie and once telephoned the fire department claiming her house was on fire. The firemen responded and began to douse the house until Matilda’s aunt convinced them the house was not on fire. Then, one night just a few weeks later, while Matilda’s aunt was away….

“….a fire did break out –
You should have heard Matilda shout!
You should have heard her scream and bawl,
And throw the window up and call
To people passing in the street –
(The rapidly increasing heat
Encouraging her to obtain
Their confidence) – but all in vain!
For every time she shouted ‘Fire!’
They only answered ‘Little Liar!’
And, therefore, when her aunt returned
Matilda, and the house, were burned.”

Lisa’s letter to me read:

“To Daddy,
Well Daddy they could call you that [Little Liar] some day. And it tells me to always tell the truth and never tell a lie. Lisa”.

A few years later, her younger sister, Grace, was caught lying and was given the same punishment. Her letter read:

“To Mom and Dad,
It’s important to be honest so you don’t get in trouble and so people will trust you. If you aren’t honest people won’t trust you on anything so you won’t get to do much. Grace”.

These memories came to my mind last Sunday when I listened to the second reading of the Mass:

“For whatever was written previously was written for our instruction, that by endurance and by the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope. May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to think in harmony with one another, in keeping with Christ Jesus,” (Rom 15:4-5)

Bill Bennett, compiled The Book of Virtues from stories, old and new, with the intention for them to collectively be an instruction manual for right living, to teach us how to be people of virtue, how to live a moral life that brings, as St. Paul says, “harmony with one another”.

But, Paul’s words tell us that there is another book, even better than Mr. Bennett’s, which has been around for over two thousand years, with stories that have been the basis for virtuous and harmonious living to entire civilizations: the Bible, God’s instruction book on how to get to heaven, and, conversely, in many cases, how not to get there.

To learn about the Cardinal Virtues one only has to read Proverbs, the stories of Solomon, or the book of Sirach to understand how to apply the virtue of Prudence; or to read the stories of David to learn about Justice, Temperance and Self-Control (see 1 Sam 24:1-23). In the Old Testament books of Judith and Esther, one can find classic examples of Fortitude.

In Exodus, Moses sets the example for Perseverance and Leadership as he leads the Israelites out of Egypt towards the Promised Land. And, Job’s experience can teach us much about Patience.

The Theological Virtues are exemplified in Genesis through the Faith of Abraham as he nearly sacrificed his son, Isaac; and the Love (Charity) and Compassion of Joseph as he forgave his brothers who sold him into slavery. And, Hope can be found on nearly every page of the Psalms.

Other examples of virtues like Responsibility, Wisdom, Hard Work, Friendship, Loyalty, and Honesty are strewn throughout the Old Testament, as are other magnificent examples of how to live in right relation to one another.

When Paul wrote, “whatever was written previously”, in his letter to the Romans, he was referring to all the books of the Old Testament. The New Testament had not yet been written, but the virtuous life of Jesus Christ was indeed being told, retold and shared throughout the known world by the Disciples who witnessed it up close and personally. And, as they, like Paul, came to realize, all that had been “written previously” simply prefigured and pointed to the life of Christ.

Jesus was the perfect man – because He was also God. Thus, He is the One Who we should look to and imitate when we want to live a virtuous life. There has never been, nor ever will be, anyone better from whom to learn about living in right and harmonious relationships.

In the predominantly secular culture of the world today, a world that has turned its back on Christian morality and is rife with hedonism, individualism, relativism, and materialism, is it any wonder there is so much hatred, turmoil and erosion of relationships among people? The ultimate casualty has been the loss of virtue.

I wish I could snap my fingers and people (myself, included) would suddenly know that earned labels such as “Little Liar”; that relationships broken due to lack of trust from those we love; and other selfish acts and vices, are behaviors that destroy us as individuals and as society. But, I know I can’t. It’s not that easy. It requires the difficult task of personally living and exhibiting the virtues in a way that others see the good. It means reading Scripture and desiring to imitate Christ. And, it requires prayer, a lot of prayer. Because, we can’t do it ourselves. Our concupiscence won’t let us. We can only live a completely virtuous life by the grace of God. Without Him, as can be seen in much of the world today, it is impossible.

With which vices do you struggle every day? What changes can you make to replace those vices with virtues and grow in holiness so that you can be an example for others?

“Heavenly Father, I pray for the grace to grow in virtue, to become a better disciple, husband, father, son, brother and friend. As I am faced with trials and temptations throughout my day, help me, Lord, to keep Christ, the One Who I desire to imitate, at the center of my life, Through Your grace, I pray I may be an example for others to follow. Amen.”

(Virtue: A Casualty of a Secular Culture was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

©2013-2019 Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Reposting and sharing of material in its full and original content is permitted, provided that full and clear credit is given to the author(s) and Reflections of a Lay Catholic.

Understanding God’s Will for Marriage

06 Wednesday Mar 2019

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Love, Marriage

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Jn17:17, Love, Marriage, Mk10:6-8, Psalm 119, Sacrifice, Sacrificial Love, Selfishness, Sirach 6:5-17, Theology of the Body

The other day I was reading a pamphlet published by the Knights of Columbus Catholic Information Service entitled God’s Plan for Love and Marriage written by Dr. Edward Sri. In his introduction he notes that fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. But, he chose to focus on the “other fifty percent”, those marriages that stay together. He asked the question, “How are those marriages doing? Are they thriving?…Are the husbands and wives really happy in their marriage?…Do their relationships, day in and day out, reflect the total, committed, sacrificial love of Jesus Christ?”

My marriage to my wife of 36 years falls into that “other fifty percent” category so, quite naturally, I stopped and pondered those questions. I felt very satisfied with the answers and truly blessed for our loving relationship. I realized, though, that the answers to the first three questions were positive because the answer to the last question was positive. Until I became Catholic thirty years into our marriage, that aspect of marriage, unfortunately, hadn’t crossed my mind.

When I made my vow at age 25 I was still fairly naive and immature, and couldn’t see the future past next week. But, I was madly in love with that beautiful young woman and wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

I wouldn’t understand it for another thirty years but one of the best things that could have happened to me was that she was Catholic and we were married in her parish church. I truly believe that God, through that Holy Sacrament, before Him in His house, gave us the grace to persevere through “better or worse” and to grow in love through the years. It’s why I can look my wife in the eye and honestly say, “I love you more today than the day we were married!”

Last Friday, March 1st, was one of those days when I was able to connect the scripture passages from the Liturgy – the O.T. reading, Psalm, Alleluia, and the Gospel – to a common theme, and reflecting on them helped me align many thoughts about marriage. I know there have been tens of thousands of books written on the subject of marriage and why so many marriages fail, but I want to broach the subject if for no other reason than for my own edification. And, who knows, maybe it will help you in supporting a young couple planning to get married or a struggling, already married, couple.

In the Alleluia, Jesus prays to the Father, “Consecrate them [the Apostles] in the truth. Your word is truth.” (Jn 17:17, NAB) Consecrate means to set them apart as priestly, or to be ordained, with their lives devoted to God. A priest’s life of devotion is his vocation, and its purpose is to do God’s will.

In Mark’s Gospel, Jesus corrects the Pharisees on their interpretation of divorce by saying, “From the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother [and be joined to his wife], and the two shall become one flesh’ So, they are no longer two but one flesh.” (Mk10:6-8, NAB) God takes two people and unites them into one flesh. Two things cannot be truly united if they work against each other instead of for each other. Thus, this union of two into one consists of a consecration, a declaration that their lives will be devoted to each other. And, living a life of devotion is a vocation with its purpose to do God’s will.

Just as “God’s will” didn’t cross my mind on my wedding day, it still doesn’t cross the minds of many couples before they enter into matrimony. Why is that? Well, I don’t think “God’s will”, is understood.

Thankfully, Pope John Paul II, in his Theology of the Body gives us a hand. Keeping it simple: God, who is pure unselfish love, created us in His image and likeness, that is to love unselfishly like Him. John Paul II calls this “self-giving” love. It is love that is 100 percent directed toward the good of the other. That is “God’s will” for us in marriage, to unselfishly give of ourselves for the good of our spouse.

Unfortunately, we each have an attitude of selfishness within us which, for many, may be too entrenched to be easily turned around. Why is that? John Paul II tells us it goes back to the Fall, when Adam and Eve realized their nakedness; when they suddenly realized their shame and became more concerned about themselves than each other. Their “self-giving” love became, as Dr. Sri calls it, “self-getting” love.

This selfishness is the root of most marital problems. As I look back on my own marriage I can see where most of our growing pains were caused by our (well, mostly my own) selfishness, an unwillingness to share emotionally, allowing worldly things to come before our need to be physically present to each other, and our lopsided faith.

You ask, “If this is a result of the original Fall of Man, then what can we do about it?” Well, it takes effort, and the hardest work of all, of course, is seeing within ourselves that which needs to be changed and then making the change for the good of another. And, it takes faith in God for the grace to make it work as perfectly as it should.

This brings me, then, to the Psalm, (Ps 119:12,16,18,27,34-35, NAB). The psalmist is asking God to, “teach me Your statutes” (v.12). He eagerly wants to know God’s will. He will take delight in them and “never forget Your word.” (v.16). He wants to see the wonder and beauty of them clearly (v.18). He wants to understand them so he can ponder them (v. 27), and then, “observe them with all my heart” (v.34), “for that is my delight” (v.35).

Therein lies the key to a successful marriage. We all know that life is never perfect, it never goes exactly as planned. It’s hard work and we struggle to make it better. Marriage is the same. The secret is to delight in loving selflessly with all our heart. Unfortunately, our human desire for selfish personal pleasure so easily overrides our desire to give of ourselves that husbands and wives often give up on trying to overcome it. And, without prayer for God’s divine assistance in their marriage, it is even more difficult.

Finally, I come to the first reading, Sirach 6:5-17. In this passage, the author talks about friendship; how to choose your friends cautiously and assuredly; the troubles that come with choosing the wrong friends; and the beauty of finally choosing good and faithful friends. He writes: “Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter; whoever finds one finds a treasure. Faithful friends are beyond price, no amount can balance their worth. Faithful friends are life-saving medicine; those who fear God will find them. Those who fear the Lord enjoy stable friendship, for as they are, so will their neighbors be.” (Sir 6:14-17)

Reading these words a second time, I replaced the word “friends” with the word, “spouse”. It all made sense. Many marriages fail because couples rush to be married before they invest themselves in knowing each other well. They don’t look in the mirror – they want all the attributes mentioned above from their partner, but fail to own and exhibit the same attributes themselves. And finally, but most importantly, they fail to trust in the Lord to help them be the spouses they need to be – husbands and wives who persevere with patience, who are prudent, who are just to one another, and who have the fortitude to love each other unselfishly.

I know every young couple wants their marital bliss to last forever. The reality, however, is that it doesn’t. The initial happiness and feeling of “being in love” wears off and husband and wife fall back into patterns of selfishness. There’s only one way to effectively turn it around and that’s through sacrificial love.

And this brings me back to the question at the beginning: “Do their relationships reflect the total, committed, sacrificial love of Jesus Christ?” When we think about Christ’s sacrifice we think about His Cross and we associate His suffering with it. But, Jesus didn’t hang there saying, “Hey, folks, this hurts so have pity on me!” Rather, He ignored his own pain the best he could and, out of love, offered his very life as a sacrifice for us. Thus, when we think about our own sufferings we tend to view them incorrectly as our crosses. Our suffering, our reluctance to give up the comfortable easy way, is not the cross we bear. No, our cross is to learn to love our spouse with a total and complete unselfish love, to do it, and, then, once we’ve figured it out, go back and find new ways to love them over and over in the ways they deserve to be loved. When couples learn and accept this, their relationships will flourish. By the grace of God, it will allow them to look their husband or wife in the eye after thirty something years and say with honesty, “I love you more today than the day we were married!”

May God bless you in your marriage and may you be an example for young couples to emulate.

“Good and gracious God, thank You for the wisdom of Your plan for our happiness. Thank You for leading me to my soul mate thirty seven years ago. And, thank You for Your mercy and grace ever since which has helped us grow closer and stronger together! Amen!”

(Understanding God’s Will for Marriage was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Happy New Year!

03 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Bible Reflections

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

Blessings, CCC27, Happiness, Happy New Year, Love, Numbers 6:24-26, Peace

On Monday the 31st, New Year’s Eve, I was shopping at the grocery store when I ran into a friend. He greeted me with, “Happy New Year!” to which I replied, “Happy New Year to you, too!” A little later I met another friend and we exchanged the same greeting. Before I left the store I had wished the checker and the grocery bagger fellow the happiest of New Years as well.

On my way home I reflected on this experience and a strange thought came to mind. What exactly did those folks mean when they said “Happy New Year!” to me? And, what did I intend when I said the same to them?

You see, I believe that words should mean things. And, it seemed that these three words spoken together at this time of year have become so familiar and expected that their meaning is no longer clear. At best, it’s a sincere but vague wish for some sort of good upon another, and, at least it’s simply an automatic response in recognition of the calendar year sequence increasing by one. I realized that I utter the greeting in both instances but, unfortunately, not often in heart-felt best wishes for another’s true happiness.

What is meant by “New Year”? Does it mean have a happy New Year’s eve celebration, a happy New Year’s day, or a happy entire new year?

And, then, define “Happy”. For whichever time period one chooses for a new year, does happiness mean joy? Does it mean cheerfulness, or exuberance, or simply peace and comfort?

Does happiness mean a year free from pain, frustration, sickness, financial struggle, or disharmony within one’s family? Surely, we know that we will always experience some of those downsides throughout our lives. So, does it mean that you wish one less of those than of the good times? If so, how much less?

Does “Happy New Year” mean one with few or no regrets? Or one in which you accomplish all or most of your resolutions?

As the clock struck midnight I was still plagued with these questions.

Go ahead, call me crazy.

Then, the next morning, New Year’s Day, my wife and I went to nine o’clock mass to celebrate the Solemnity of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of God. As we entered church we were greeted, and we greeted others, with, you guessed it, “Happy New Year”. Of course, the previous day’s questions returned to the forefront of my mind.

As I listened to the first reading from Scripture, Numbers 6:22-27 (NAB), I discovered the answer to my questions in the words which the Lord asked Moses to speak to Aaron and his sons:

“The LORD bless you and keep you!
The LORD let His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you!
The LORD look upon you kindly and give you peace!”

What better wish can one wish upon another for an evening, a day, or an entire year than to be blessed by our Lord; to feel His love and mercy; to be overcome with His grace; and to be filled with His peace! Are these not the fundamental components of personal happiness?

The world will always throw obstacles in our way which, if our happiness depends on material things, will prevent us from reaching the desired level of comfort, wealth or position, or acquiring certain possessions that we believe will bring us pleasure. We will be afflicted with health issues that will inevitably bring pain and which will create unhappiness within us if our happiness doesn’t depend on God. Even God Himself will throw obstacles in our way to test our resolve, patience and willingness to trust in Him. These things are given in life. Measuring our happiness in terms of worldly desires is a recipe for failure. Even if we accomplished all of these things but failed to have a relationship with Christ, we would not be truly happy.

We are reminded of this in the first two lines of Chapter One of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC27):

“The desire for God is written in the human heart, because man is created by God and for God; and God never ceases to draw man to himself. Only in God will he find the truth and happiness he never stops searching for.”

Ultimately, greeting someone with “Happy New Year” should be considered a blessing, a heart-felt desire for the other to encounter the goodness and generosity of God.

You and I will now look at this greeting in a new light. When we look someone in the eye and say, “Happy New Year!”, our intention will actually be a prayer for God to bless them abundantly. But, I know most people won’t understand it this way. For them, it will continue to simply be a formality, the expected familiar greeting. That’s okay. We know in our hearts that it’s the thought that counts.

So, I’ll wrap this up with, “HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOURS!”

“Heavenly Father, as I look back over the last year, I give You immeasurable thanks for all the many blessings You bestowed on me and my family. And, I take this opportunity to examine my conscience, to replay my faults and failings in virtue over the last twelve months. I resolve, Lord, to grow in piety, to learn more about my faith, and to act in ways that will help me become a better disciple, husband, father, grandfather, son, brother and friend. Amen.”

(Happy New Year! was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

A Man of Mercy (Reposted from the Archives)

19 Wednesday Dec 2018

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Advent, Bible Reflections, Christmas, Forgiveness, Love, Mercy

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Forgiveness, Jason Gray, Jesus, Joseph, Love, Mary, Matthew 1:18-25, Mercy, Miracle

Since yesterday’s Gospel was from Matthew 1:18-25, the story of the birth of Jesus, I meant to post this yesterday. But, I got busy with other stuff and forgot. Every year during Advent I think about St. Joseph and what was going through his heart and mind when he learned that his betrothed was carrying a child that wasn’t his. And, I’m reminded of Jason Gray’s song Forgiveness is a Miracle (A Song for Joseph) (link to YouTube music video) in which he paints for us a profound example of mercy that was offered by Joseph, and gives us some insight into the divine wisdom of God. Both the Gospel and the song help me to remember God’s will for me every day is always about love. I hope you enjoy the song, that it encourages you to find a way to grow in love and mercy, and that it helps you prepare your heart to be offered as a gift to our Lord on His birthday. Let me know what you think.

God bless you and may this be your best Advent and Christmas ever!

A Man of Mercy(Reprinted from 5 December 2013)

About this time last year I was listening to a new CD I had purchased by my new favorite singer/songwriter, Jason Gray. The CD is called Christmas Stories: Repeat the Sounding Joy. One particular song on it, “Forgiveness Is A Miracle (A Song For Joseph)”, caught my attention because it was so different from any other Christmas song I had ever heard. Plus, its subject was something which I had never considered: what was going through Joseph’s mind and heart prior to, and during, his wife giving birth to not his son, but Jesus, the Son of God?

I discovered that Jason Gray had written an article for The Rabbit Room describing the story behind the song and he explores this difficult situation in which Joseph found himself. I have re-posted his article below and included a link to The Rabbit Room’s website. I hope you find it as thought provoking as I did.

http://www.rabbitroom.com/2012/10/the-story-behind-forgiveness-is-a-miracle/

The Story Behind “Forgiveness Is a Miracle”

by Jason Gray on October 16, 2012

As I approached writing songs for each of the characters in the Christmas story, I felt particularly protective of Joseph, who I think sometimes doesn’t get the attention he’s due. At the very least I know that I’ve been guilty of not really “seeing” him for the remarkable man that he was, and I wanted to amend that. I enlisted my friend Andy Gullahorn, one of the most masterful storytellers I know, to explore a particular moment in Joseph’s story with me.

Taking my cue from Frederick Buechner’s book, “Peculiar Treasures,” in which he breathes new life into biblical characters who have grown so familiar to us that we no longer experience them as real human beings, I hoped to recapture some of the humanity of the people in the Christmas narrative. It was also important to me to try and write songs that were relevant beyond the four weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas day. I wanted to tell timeless human stories, and with Joseph we have the makings of just that with a love triangle, a question of revenge or forgiveness, and the age old drama of fathers and sons.

As I read his part in the narrative, I found that more than just a foster parent without much to do (as he was often relegated to in my mind), Joseph is revealed as a man after God’s own heart. Faced not only with the news that his fiancée is pregnant, but also with her incredulous story of how it was God’s doing, Joseph’s character is tested and laid out for all of us to see. What will he do? Will he hurt the one who has hurt him? Will he forgive? This is his moment, and all of history waits and watches in wonder.

There are few things more painful than the betrayal and rejection by the one you love most, so we know it must have deeply wounded him—shattering the dreams he may have had of a future with the girl he loved. Pain is like a lightning bolt striking with a violent energy that can’t be held in the human heart for long. It looks for a way out. The way it usually passes through us is in the all too common progression of hurt turning into anger and then into vengeance. Unless the miracle of forgiveness takes place in a person’s heart to absorb it, the pain we experience will pass through us and be visited upon others.

There is debate as to whether it was within Joseph’s power to have her stoned—while Jewish custom might have allowed it, Roman rule did not. However, if not to her body, we know he still could have done violence to her reputation and her heart. But I believe that Joseph did the hard work of bringing his pain to God rather than letting it pass through him, and that God graced him with the miracle of forgiveness. The narrative tells us he was a “godly man” and that instead of doing her harm, “he decided to dismiss her quietly” so that she wouldn’t be publicly shamed. He took the full force of the blow and–acting as the husband he might have been–became a covering over her supposed sin.

It’s hard for us to experience the tension in Joseph’s story since, as the reader, we know from the start that she isn’t guilty of what he naturally supposes and that God is up to something beautiful that the world has never seen before. But to see Joseph for who he is, I have to remember that he couldn’t know these things in real time. It was only after he had given himself to the work of forgiveness that the angel appeared to him in a dream to tell him that what Mary had said was true after all, and that he should marry her.

It occurred to me that perhaps this is where Joseph’s heart was proven—if not to God who already knew his heart, then perhaps to himself. (I haven’t met a man yet who isn’t daunted by the responsibility of being a father, let alone a father to the Son of God. Maybe this was a test to reveal to Joseph what kind of man he could be.) In this moment he is found to be a man of mercy, which I imagine to be just the kind of man that God was looking for to be the earthly father of his son Jesus. In a way, we see that Joseph carries in his heart the same world changing power of forgiveness that Mary carried in her womb.

It’s also meaningful to me to think of how Joseph forgiving Mary is part of the story that leads to the birth of the savior in whom Joseph would find forgiveness for his own sins. Perhaps it’s the narrative form of Jesus’ teaching that as we forgive we find ourselves forgiven.

As we wrote the song, it was good to be reminded that forgiveness is a kind of miracle. I could be wrong, but I’m not sure that we can muster up forgiveness on our own. It seems to me to be a supernatural force of renewal that we participate in as we point our hearts toward it, pray for it, and make room for it in our lives, but that ultimately we receive it as a gift from God, in his due time.

Forgiveness Is A Miracle (A Song For Joseph)
By Jason Gray / Andy Gullahorn
From Christmas Stories: Repeat the Sounding Joy

Love can make a soul come alive
Love can draw a dream out of the darkness
And blow every door open wide
But love can leave you broken hearted

Did she dare to look you in the eye
Did her betrayal leave you raging?
Did you let her see you cry
When she said the child was not your baby?

Pain can turn to anger then to vengeance
It happens time and again
Even in the best of men
It takes a miracle to save us

When love is like an open wound
There’s no way to stop the bleeding
Did you lose sleep over what to do?
Between what’s just and what brings healing

Pain can be a road to find compassion
When we don’t understand, and bring a better end
It takes a miracle to show us

Forgiveness is a miracle
A miracle
And a miracle can change your world
Forgiveness is a miracle

An angel in a dream spoke into your darkest night
So you trusted in the Lord and you took her as your wife
But the forgiveness that you gave would be given back to you
Because you carried in your heart what she was holding in her womb

Love was in a crowded barn
There you were beside her kneeling
You held it in your arms
As the miracle started breathing

Forgiveness is the miracle
The miracle
And a miracle will change your world
Forgiveness is the miracle
Forgiveness is the miracle
The miracle
A miracle will save the world
Forgiveness is the miracle
Forgiveness is the miracle
Forgiveness is the miracle

Blessed Joseph
Your heart is proven
And through you the Kingdom has come
For God delights in a man of mercy
And has found an earthly father for his son

(A Man of Mercy: (Reposted from the Archives) was first published on the blog Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

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