Why Do Catholics Give Things Up For Lent?

14 Friday Mar 2014

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Churches, Discernment, Lent, Renewal

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It’s been almost a year since I officially became Catholic, and two extraordinary, life changing years since that amazing weekend when I made up my mind to join the Church.

Last week during Ash Wednesday mass it occurred to me that that particular mass was the beginning of my first real Lent. Last year I was wrapped up in the details of the Sacraments of Initiation and, I think, much of Lent got lost in the shuffle in preparing for baptism, confirmation and first communion. And, while I was kneeling there in church I remembered that, besides fasting and abstinence on the prescribed days, I was expected to sacrifice something, or “give something up” for the next seven weeks. Having not spent much time planning for the season I wasn’t sure what that something would be, and I vowed to sleep on it overnight with the hope that maybe something would pop into my mind.

The next day found a co-worker and me driving to southern Indiana on business. The conversation turned to Friday night’s fish fry at my church and my co-worker asked me, “Why do Catholics give things up for Lent?” I replied that it represented Jesus’ sacrifice during His forty days in the desert. But, then, it struck me that I really didn’t answer his question. There had to be an answer much deeper than that and so, after humming and hawing a bit, I embarrassingly admitted to him that I really didn’t know.

This was, to say the least, bothersome for me. I ought to have known and been able to give an adequate explanation straight off the cuff. I did remember from last year that the season of Lent for me as a catechumenate was focused on preparing for my renewal through baptism. Beyond that my knowledge was on shaky ground. I knew it would drive me crazy if I didn’t settle this and get it straight in my mind so I could rapid-fire it back to the next person who might ask me. I needed to get to the bottom of it.

Not wanting to admit my ignorance any more than I had to, I chose not to ask anyone for their opinion until I had done some research on my own. I Googled the subject and found several sites whose authors tried to give explanations but, with vocabularies much more advanced than mine, I didn’t understand what they were trying to tell me. I needed it to be dumbed down a little. I also noticed that different articles seemed to emphasize different reasons for observing Lent. I was getting more confused by the moment. Confused but also more determined.

Finally, on Monday I broke down and confided in some friends about my dilemma. One was as confounded as I was and couldn’t explain it any better than I did. A couple more offered their opinions in words I could understand. Their explanations sounded good but they still didn’t quite agree with each other.

That night found me away from home in a hotel room and in the usual uncomfortable hotel room bed. So, I had a few hours of tossing and turning in bed to toss and turn this idea of Lent around in my head. Getting nowhere, I rolled out of bed in desperation and knelt on the floor on one of the extra pillows and prayed to God for some relief – either let me sleep or let me figure out this Lent business in terms that make sense to me.

God didn’t disappoint me. And, it wasn’t sleep that I was afforded. It seemed that once I began praying for understanding I started seeing the big picture more clearly. It wasn’t long before the bits and pieces from all my sources started fitting together and making sense in a way that I knew I could defend:

God doesn’t need us to give up anything for Him. But, He does want us to become closer to Jesus by emulating Him.
Lent is a period of renewal, of dying to ourselves so that we may rise again, like Jesus died and rose from the dead.
Lent is a time to shed destructive tendencies and commit to new, positive lives.
Like Jesus sacrificed in the desert, we, too, should sacrifice through fasting as a form of self-discipline.
Through this self-discipline, we become stronger and more successful at denying Satan’s daily temptations.
That same self-discipline helps us become closer to Jesus by improving our prayer time.
By focusing on our spiritual lives during Lent, we have the opportunity to reflect and seek reconciliation and do penance as a form of sacrifice in reaching that state of renewal.
And, Lent is a period of increased charity (alms in the form of giving to those less fortunate), and becoming Christ-like by focusing on loving our neighbors and less on ourselves.

The experts may tell me there is more to it than this but, you know what, these are good enough answers for me, ones I think I can remember.

Satisfied, I climbed back in bed and the rest of my prayer was answered. I fell asleep.

On Tuesday, while at my office near Somerset, Ohio, I was still pondering Lent. I felt I had answered the “Why” question but I realized the “What” and “How” questions as they applied to my life were still unanswered.

Last September I posted The Cradle of Faith In Ohio and I mentioned the oldest Catholic church in Ohio is only a about a half mile as the crow flies from my Somerset office. I have stopped in to St. Joseph’s a couple times and prayed in the quiet solitude of that beautiful church. And, so, I decided I would stop again and pray for discernment of what I could do to make the most impact in my life and on the lives of others this Lent. Unfortunately, St. Joseph’s was locked up and I was bummed to think I would have to stew on this during the two hour ride home. I left St. Joseph’s via a different route than normal that took me through the half of the village of Somerset in which I had never been. To my surprise and delight I discovered another Catholic church, Holy Trinity, a beautiful church built in the mid-1800’s. And, it was open!

Holy Trinity Church, Someset, Ohio

I walked in and took a pew about half way down on Mary’s side. I sat alone in the perfect silence of this old and beautiful church, contemplating Lent, and praying about what I should do.

Holy Trinity Church, Somerset, Ohio

Fifty minutes later I had my answers and my Lenten commitment was solidified. I could now get on with life and experience Lent the way it should be experienced.

Oh, I didn’t tell you what I decided to do, did I? Well, I’m going to follow the words of Jesus as recounted in Matthew 6:1-4 and 6:16-18 and “not blow the trumpet before me” and keep my plans for fasting and almsgiving a “secret”. Sorry folks.

Have a blessed and meaningful Lenten season!

(The post Why Do Catholics Give Things Up for Lent? first appeared in Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Are you in the Garden or in the Desert?

21 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Faith, Spirituality

≈ 1 Comment

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Faith, God-moments, Prayer, Spirituality

Since I wrote and posted How’s Your Spirituality? last week, I have tried to pay more attention to how I feel about my relationship with Christ, and to how I have shown, through my actions, the value I place on my relationship with Him. I have reflected and tried to assess whether each day has been lush with hope, or spiritually dry from a poor or indifferent attitude, and whether or not there was any particular aspect of my feelings or behavior that I could improve.

For the most part I had a good week. I was happy with the way I had shown charity to others and for the way I kept my cool in some tense situations. But, I felt I could have done better by taking my prayer time more seriously and so I gave my hour of adoration on Monday a little kick in the butt to make up for it.

Then Tuesday rolled around. It started off on a good note but turned into a hectic morning at the office. There was a particular issue that arose, one of those situations where you can choose to do nothing and let the pieces fall where they may, or you can step in and fix it as quickly as possible to stem the bleeding, so to speak. I chose to do the latter. Wrong decision.

Actually, it felt like the right decision for about four hours. Then it turned sour and it became obvious that it had been the wrong one. Big time wrong. It wasn’t like a mortal sin, rather, it was just a major bone-head moment that included poor judgment that resulted in a serious leadership faux-pas that would impact things outside of my realm of responsibility. By the end of the day I was bewildered. I was absolutely convinced when I made the decision that it was the right one and, so, it was disturbing when it finally sunk in how wrong I was. I went home that evening and barely talked to my family. I hardly slept that night. I profusely apologized to my boss the next morning and sincerely hoped that what may have been the worst mistake I had ever made in my career wouldn’t be my last one.

While I was licking my wounds and pondering what went wrong and why, I thought about turning to God and praying for understanding and that things could be made right. But, I just didn’t feel like doing it. I didn’t have the right words or thoughts in me. And, because I didn’t feel I could do the exact thing I knew I ought to do – turn to Him – I felt even more frustrated. I suddenly felt like I had been transported to Yuma, Arizona in the middle of the summer – kind of a spiritually bone-dry desert with no hope of survival.

Then, God-moment number one appeared.

On Wednesday morning, after I had diligently worked all morning to round up the cats and stuff them back in the bag, I took a moment during my lunch break to go to a blog site I visit from time to time by Father Robert Barron, founder of the global ministry, Word on Fire, and the Rector/President of Mundelein Seminary. The subject of his blog post for the day, believe it or not, was “How should we address spiritually dry periods?”

He quoted Sir Winston Churchill when he was asked by someone, “What do you do when you’re going through Hell?” to which Churchill responded by saying, “You keep going!” You get through it, and get it behind you.

Fr. Barron went on to say that when God draws us in, he allows us to feel uplifted, excited and enthusiastic about the experience. But then, God will often withdraw that feeling from us to show us that we’re not supposed to fall in love with the experience, we’re meant to fall in love with Him.

According to Fr. Barron, God puts us in a desert that can feel like a time of pure desolation. So, what do you do? You hang in there, you keep going, you don’t give up, you get through it. You keep your eyes focused on God, not on your good feelings or your bad feelings.

He used the analogy of a marriage. After the wedding day, the euphoria goes away. You’re not supposed to fall in love with your feelings, you’re supposed to fall in love with each other, through good times and bad, for better or for worse, and so on. “It’s the same way with religion, you’re either in the garden or you’re in the desert. But, that’s life. You keep your eyes focused on God.”

This was a whole new perspective worth considering. I had to ask myself if, in the newness of my faith, I have been in love with the feeling and with the activity of being Christian? I truly love being Catholic, but am I truly loving, and keeping my eyes focused on, God?

Enter God-moment number two.

After leaving Fr. Barron’s blog site, I continued to surf around on-line. I came across a passage from the book That Tremendous Love by Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen. To be honest, I didn’t, and still don’t, know much about Archbishop Sheen but I have often seen references to him and to profound things he’s said. I thought I would finally actually read something attributed to him so I read the passage:

“At the beginning one loves God for only his gifts or for the emotions He sends us. He treats us then, ‘like a young woman who is being courted.’ If gifts are no longer given in abundance after true marriage has occurred it is not because the husband’s love is less, but because it is greater. For now he gives himself. It is not the husband’s gifts that his wife loves nor his compliments, nor even the thrill of pleasure she gets from his company. She loves him. The moment the Lover is loved for Himself, then the nature of the gifts ceases to matter. If God withdraws all sensible gifts it is only because He wants the union between the soul and Himself to be more personal and less dependent on His generosity.”

Now, what do you think the chances were that I would, in the state of mind that I was in at the moment, find not one but two articles, in two totally separate locations on the internet, directly related to my acute spiritual condition of the day? Slim to none is my first guess. No, I believe God intended for me to find those. He intended for me to ponder our relationship and for me to ask if I was in love with him or if I was in love with the feeling of being new in Him. He was telling me I need to focus on Him even when I feel small and incapable of doing so. He was telling me to not give up when the going gets tough and the environment gets dry, but to keep on going and to turn to Him for help. He was telling me it’s nicer in the garden than it is in the desert.

Where are you, in the Garden or in the Desert?

“O my God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me … Therefore, I will trust You always though I may seem to be lost I will not fear, for You are always with me, O my dear God.” – Thomas Merton

(The post, “Are You in the Garden or in the Desert?” first appeared in Reflections of a Lay Catholic.)

How’s Your Spirituality?

13 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Faith, Love, Prayer, Scripture

≈ 1 Comment

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Charity, Faith, HolySpirit, Love, Prayer

Every six weeks or so when I see my friend, Tim, I get asked the question, “Hey, Jer, how’s your spirituality?” The neat thing is he’s not just making small talk, he’s sincerely interested in knowing how I’m doing spiritually and is willing to jump in and give me a boost if I need it.

The first time he asked me I was taken by surprise and didn’t know what to say, so I gave him an automatic, “Great, everything’s wonderful!” response. The next time I was a little better prepared and, fortunately for me, I was being truthful when I said, “Man, it couldn’t be better.” The third time he asked, I hesitated because, although I wanted to tell him everything was fantastic, I would have been lying. Instead, I gave him a tentative look and said, “Well, actually, I’ve been going through a little dry spell lately.” And then, true to form, he helped me talk through it and helped me get back on track.

Tim’s concern for not necessarily just my physical well being but, instead, for my spiritual health, is a good example of the type of friend I’ve made since becoming a Christian. I have been blessed with many friends just like him.

At some point a couple months ago I started thinking seriously about his question. “Why should I wait for him to ask me? Why not ask myself from time to time? And, if I take time for reflection and do a self-evaluation, how do I describe and qualify my spiritual life? What makes it great as opposed to being only mediocre or not good at all?”

First, I thought I needed to define Spirituality. So, I Googled the word hoping to find a dictionary but the first hit that came up was a link to the Student Wellness Center at Ohio State University (go figure?). Their definition of Spirituality started out like this, “Spirituality is not religion and is not even necessarily affiliated with religion.” I thought, “Hmm, the heck you say!” Obviously, this was not going to get me close to the spirit (pun intended) of what Tim was asking. Finally, in checking Webster’s dictionary, I found a suitable definition – “Spirituality: The sensitivity or attachment to religious values”. I thought, “Now, I can work with that!”.

The word “Sensitivity” lends itself towards how I feel about my religious values. Generally, from one day to the next, I feel grateful, excited and full of hope about my faith in God, my acceptance of Jesus Christ as my Savior, and my desire to live life as He wants me to live – full of charity for, and service to, others. It feels good to acknowledge and accept His love, and to recognize and proclaim my love in return.

But, I have so-so days at times, too. These are when I feel overwhelmed trying to understand everything; feeling confounded that I can’t get the pieces to fit together, which causes me to doubt; and days when life simply gets in the way and keeps me from those precious prayer moments.

Then, there are the bad days: the days when I let my concupiscence get the upper hand; days when I let stress and aggravation cause me to feel less charitable than I ought to be and I don’t realize it until it is too late

The second part of the definition is, “Attachment to religious values”. Unlike the feelings related to sensitivity, “Attachment” conjures up the idea of putting that acceptance into action. Again, there seem to be different levels of qualification to this aspect.

The best days seem to include some element of showing kindness to others – there’s not much that feels better than that. I admit I feel pleased with myself when I go out of my way to help others. Same thing for sacrificing for others – there’s just something special about it. And then there’s prayer. The act of telling and showing Him my love, and accepting His love, definitely produces a spiritual high. I’ve noticed, too, the wonderful feeling, the positive self-affirmation, when I do something that appears to influence and lead others toward Christ. I feel like I’ve earned my pay for the day.

In business it’s often said, “Some days they pay me too much and others they don’t pay me nearly enough.” The same goes with spirituality, I think. There are days I just don’t earn the right to feel very spiritual. Days when I don’t act with love to others. Times when I take out frustrations either intentionally or unintentionally on others. And, worst of all, when I sin and I know I’m sinning but I do it anyway. I’m thankful this doesn’t happen often but when it does it feels devastating. When I look at those actions in retrospect, I know that Jesus is weeping for me.

When I became Catholic, many caring friends, Tim and others, cautioned me to take it easy, to accept a certain slowness to the learning process. Sometimes I just don’t want to go slow. But, I think they’re right. It’s easy to put the cart before the horse, as the saying goes, and get ahead of myself in trying to understand Christianity and trying to live it like a saint. I kind of feel like a newbie golfer who is just learning the game but gets frustrated because he can’t shoot par. It’s easy to lose sight of the fact that even the pros don’t always shoot par.

During this exercise of examining my spirituality I’ve learned a few other things, too. I’ve found that when I pray, when I read the scriptures, study the bible, and associate with other men and women who do the same, I begin to understand what was in Jesus’ mind and I think I’m starting to think more like he did. My mind is becoming renewed. Instead of just existing in the flesh like I did for years, I have begun existing in Spirit, too. I think my mind has reached a higher level because of its connection with the Holy Spirit.

So whoever is in Christ is a new creation: the old things have passed away; behold, new things have come. – 2 Corinthians 5:17

I am so very grateful to all the people who have gently pushed me, pulled me, guided me, offered insight along the way, and waited at each way-point with open arms and a knowing smile. I appreciate friends like Tim, the guys in my bible study group, the men and women on the Christ Renews His Parish teams, and my family who care enough about me to ask about my spirituality, my walk with God. It’s heartening to know that, as I move ahead, you will be there for me. God bless you all.

(The post How’s Your Spirituality? appeared first on Reflections of a Lay Catholic)

Eucharistic Adoration: One Hour of Peace, Hope and Love

09 Sunday Feb 2014

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Eucharistic Adoration, Prayer

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Eucharistic Adoration, Grace, Love, Prayer

It’s been a while since I posted anything about prayer and I think it’s about time to bring the subject up again. I’ve been praying a lot lately for guidance and strength to get me through some difficult tasks, and for the health and well being of some people I know. Tonight, I’m particularly looking forward to 6:00 p.m. tomorrow when I go to church for my hour of Eucharistic Adoration, that special one hour of the week when it’s just me and Jesus.

I tend to do my best praying when I’m in church and the best time to do that, I’ve found, is during that one hour a week I set aside to pray in front of the tabernacle during Eucharistic Adoration. I look forward to the quiet time and the feeling that I am in His presence.

I mentioned in an older post that I was still getting used to praying. I still am today. I tend to ramble. I need to be more succinct so I can fit it all in when I only have a short amount of time. I have found, though, that my time in prayer is tremendously more satisfying with less pressure on myself to get it all just right when I schedule a full hour in Eucharistic Adoration once a week and take my time.

As a Catholic I believe the bread and wine, the consecrated Hosts, are actually the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Christ – combined, they are the real presence of Christ. The basis for this belief is found in Matthew 26:26-28:

“While they were eating, Jesus took bread, said the blessing, broke it, and giving it to his disciples said, ‘Take and eat; this is my body.’ Then he took a cup, gave thanks, and gave it to them, saying, ‘Drink from it, all of you, for this is my blood of the covenant, which will be shed on behalf of many for the forgiveness of sins.’”

For me, tomorrow is not just any night of Eucharistic Adoration. It’s Adoration with the Blessed Sacrament exposed, which, in my opinion, is the most profound and satisfying way to pray. Exposition is when the Blessed Sacrament is removed from the tabernacle and exposed for Adoration in a monstrance, a sculpture with a glass enclosure that reveals the Host.

Pope Francis 1 with a monstrance

When I pray during Adoration, whether it is when the Host is exposed or not (reposed), I genuflect for most of that hour. What is significant about an hour, you ask? Well, that comes from when Jesus, after agonizing in the Garden of Gethsemane, finds his disciples asleep. Upon waking them, He asks Peter, “So you could not keep watch with me for one hour?” – Matthew 26:40.

The glory of Eucharistic Adoration is best described in the words of Blessed Pope John Paul II, “The Eucharist is a priceless treasure: by not only celebrating it (at Mass) but also by praying before it outside of Mass we are enabled to make contact with the very wellspring of grace…We must understand that in order ‘to do’, we must first learn ‘to be’, that is to say, in the sweet company of Jesus in adoration.”

When I am in adoration I always feel a sense of calmness, of comfort, and my thoughts come to me more clearly. I find when I am laying it all on the line to Jesus, or just having a casual one-sided conversation with Him, my thoughts flow much easier than at any other time of prayer. Sometimes I catch myself doing all the “talking” and I have to quiet myself down and simply try to soak up the joy of being in His presence. In author Kathleen Carroll’s words, “The best kind of friend is the one with whom you can spend time without having to say anything. You can just share the moment and enjoy each other’s company, knowing your relationship is deeper than the spoken word. That kind of silent communication is what takes place between you and Jesus when you participate in Eucharistic Adoration.”

The first couple times I spent an hour in adoration I knelt the whole time and actually spent the entire hour having a one-sided conversation with Jesus. I would run out of things to say so I would repeat myself which made me feel a little stupid. But, the more I went, the more I observed that other adorers would spend about half their time kneeling in prayer and the other half sitting and contemplating. I asked and learned that it was okay to do that. I also learned that it is okay to spend time simply gazing at the Host and soaking up being in the presence of Jesus. It is okay to sit and consider the life of Christ and what he might say to you in light of your circumstances in life. And, it is okay to just sit and listen – listen for that still small voice, that bit of clarity that will give you the direction for which you’ve been searching. It’s okay to bring your bible and read passages from it, or your prayer book from which you might recite some prayers special to the moment. It’s okay to write in your journal about how it feels, what is on your mind, and to record the specific things for which you are praying. And, I have found the more I spend that one hour a week in the presence of Jesus I tend to agree more and more with Mother Teresa’s sentiments, “The time you spend with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is the best time you will spend on earth. Each moment that you spend with Jesus will deepen your union with Him and make your soul everlastingly more glorious and beautiful in Heaven, and will help bring about everlasting peace on earth.”

Most adults I know are married, have a significant other, and/or have children. Imagine the sadness we would have if we couldn’t spend at least one hour a week with them, the ones we love more than any others on earth. Then, imagine the ridiculousness of accepting that it would be okay to not schedule at least one hour a week to devote to the one’s you love the most. Now convey that thought over to our relationship with Christ. Can we not spend one hour per week getting to know Him better and letting Him help us get to know ourselves better? By doing so, will we not be able to love our families and friends here on earth more fully?

If you have not had or taken the opportunity to pray during Eucharistic Adoration, I hope you give it a try. Many parishes have Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration with continuous exposure of the Blessed Sacrament, and some, like ours, offer exposure one day per week with each week having a different day. I’m sure you will find your hour well spent and that it will be a special time filled with the Lord’s peace, hope and love. For those of you reading this who do participate in weekly Adoration, I pray that you will encourage others who don’t by inviting them to join you to see what they are missing. As Fr. Sean Davidson, of the Missionaries of the Most Holy Eucharist, who visited our parish to help us get Perpetual Adoration up and running, said, “The adoration of Jesus in the Eucharist also leads to greater reverence at Mass, a deeper desire for personal holiness, and a stronger sense of union with the parish and the whole Church.”

Good night, God Bless, and may you find His Grace through your hour of Eucharistic Adoration.

(Eucharistic Adoration: One Hour of Peace, Hope and Love, was first published on Reflections of a Lay Catholic. Portions of this post were excerpted from Finding Grace Through Eucharistic Adoration)

On Second Thought, I Did Have a God-Moment

14 Tuesday Jan 2014

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Bible Reflections, Faith, Love, Marriage, Prayer

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

God-moments, Love, Prayer

It’s been over a month since I sat down to write. December found Melinda and I a little busy with preparing for Christmas and for my daughter Mary’s wedding the Saturday after Christmas, and driving to and from Lake Charles, Louisiana for both.

In spite of all that activity, I tried to stay focused on the “Reason for the Season”. These were my first Advent and Christmas seasons as a Catholic and I wanted to make sure I experienced the difference between the two.

Although I didn’t miss a Mass or Holy day of obligation during the almost two weeks we were down South, there was so much activity that my daily prayer routine was seriously interrupted. By the time we returned home I desperately needed to get back into my faith.

Back at home, I made it to the New Year’s Eve vigil Mass but by the time Epiphany Sunday rolled around I came down with a case of bronchitis and was struck with fits of such violent coughing that I decided to stay home and not ruin other folks’ worship that morning. It was a little disappointing to me because it was the first Mass I had missed since becoming Catholic last Easter and only the second time since my decision to convert in April 2012.

But, by the next Wednesday I was feeling well enough to get with the men’s bible study group I meet with every two weeks. After the scripture discussion we went around the room and, as always, volunteered our “God-moments” – those times when God shows up in your life and graces you unexpectedly. I told the guys that over the two weeks I was gone I really hadn’t noticed any God-moments – none had jumped out at me. Then, as the others related their God-moments, I began to think back and I realized, again, that I didn’t see them because I wasn’t looking for them. In fact, I wasn’t just not looking for them, I had instead been so occupied with other things that I had literally closed my mind and heart to them. And, as I relived our trip, I came to see how there were many God moments that passed undetected right under my nose:

Jesus was with us in our car that first day of driving as we struggled through eight hours of torrential rain and storms between Ohio and Southeast Missouri where we spent Saturday night at my folks.

Attending the only Sunday Mass at Sacred Heart Catholic Church in Dexter, Missouri would have put us in Lake Charles very late that night. So, we skipped it and hoped to find someplace else along the way. Looking ahead, I estimated we could be near Hammond, Louisiana around 5:00 p.m., so I checked masstimes.org to see if there were any Sunday evening masses in that neighborhood. I don’t think it was dumb luck that there happened to be a Mass at the Holy Ghost Catholic Church in Hammond at 5:00 p.m. I plugged the address into my GPS and nine hours later we arrived at 4:50 p.m.

God was speaking to me through Fr. Robert Merced, pastor at Holy Ghost Church, when he elaborated on the Gospel reading, Matthew 1:18 – 24, for this 4^th Sunday of Advent. In it, Matthew describes, “…how the birth of Jesus came about.” I had already spent much time marveling at the caliber of man Joseph must have been to forgive his betrothed and marry her instead of “divorcing her quietly” or, worse, having her stoned. But Fr. Merced opened my eyes to the fact that Mary’s faith was equally strong. As a young woman, she knew that to be unmarried and be with child was an offense against the Jewish laws punishable by stoning until death. Yet, through her faith, she still said, “Yes”.

On our first morning in town we met a friend for breakfast at a local café. We briefly chatted over coffee about children, but then our friend moved right into a heartfelt discussion about preparing our hearts for Christmas and not getting caught up in the busyness and commercialization of the season. With only two days to go until Christmas, and a wedding looming just three days later, she somehow knew what we needed to curb our mounting anxiety.

The next morning, Christmas Eve, found me, my soon to be son-in-law, Michael, his father, and a fishing guide skimming across the marsh hoping to slay some redfish. It turned out to be one of the best fishing trips I had ever been on. We limited out on reds, and caught several speckled trout and flounder as well. I won’t be so bold as to say that Jesus helped us catch fish like he helped Peter, but His love was there in an unexpected way through the opportunity for Michael and I to get to know each other much better. I caught a bunch of keepers that day but I also confirmed I was catching a keeper son-in-law.

We wrapped up Christmas Eve by enjoying a traditional Christmas Eve dinner with our close friends who were graciously putting us up in their home for the week, and then attending the Christmas Vigil Mass at the Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception in Lake Charles. It was a beautiful Mass and celebration of the birth of our Lord, in a beautiful church, with an angelic A cappella choir.

Christmas day was a relaxing one with the morning spent in the company of Mary and Michael, Michael’s parents and the three of us opening gifts and having fun, followed by a wonderful dinner in the afternoon with more relatives, and with plenty of time to contemplate why we were celebrating in the first place.

On Thursday, we were blessed with the safe arrival of our other two daughters and their husbands, my parents, my brother and sister and their families for another round of gift giving and a delicious fish fry from the fruits of our catch two days earlier. We gave sincere thanks for everyone’s safe travel and “…these Thy gifts…which we… received, from Thy bounty”.

When Friday rolled around the wedding preparation activities picked up speed. Since Mary is my third daughter to get married, I knew what I needed to do: stay out of the way, do what I was told and be an efficient gopher. I know some dads who have found the role of being the Father of the Bride daunting. I have found it to be immensely pleasurable. It gives me a chance to see the joy and hope in my daughters’ eyes and in their smiles, and one last chance to get comfortable with the idea that life is turning out like God intended – that they found someone to love and spend the rest of their lives with. Did I get sentimental? Yes, but my happiness for her far outweighed any last moment feelings of selfishness.

Friday also saw dozens of other relatives arrive safely into town from around the country. When we finally assembled that evening for the rehearsal dinner, Mary and Michael had about sixty relatives surrounding them. God was there in the hearts of everyone as there were many reunions that night. And He was there in the smile on the face of my 15 month old, first and only, great-niece when I met her for the first time.

Saturday, the day of Mary’s “big event” arrived and it seemed to fly by without a hitch. We arrived at the church at the appointed time, and before I knew it I was walking down the aisle, arm and arm with Mary looking as beautiful as I’d ever seen her. My only thought as they opened the doors for us to process in was a prayer of thanks to God for blessing me with such a wonderful loving daughter and the opportunity to be her father and make this walk down the aisle with her arm in mine.

God was there with us as we reached the altar and I turned to Mary, hugged and kissed her, and told her I love her, and she replied with, “I love you, too, Dad”. And, He was there with us when I turned to hug Michael and asked him to please take care of her, and he replied with a sincere, “Yes sir, it will be my pleasure.” Lots of dreams came true in that moment, and not just for the bride and groom.

Unexpectedly, the priest revealed to us that that particular weekend was the celebration of the Feast of the Holy Family, a fitting time to become united in the first step to starting a new family. It also struck me that both the bride and groom have good role models in their parents and grandparents. Both sets of parents have been married for a total of about 65 years, and for Mary, at least, her grandparents for 110 years.

Following the wedding ceremony, everyone reconvened at the reception venue where the first order of business was the traditional first dance by the bride and groom. God was here, too. As they began to dance to the song, I Won’t Give Up by Jason Mraz, I looked up onto the DJ’s stage to see my youngest daughter, Grace, with microphone in hand and performing the song live, unassisted by any lyrics on a karaoke machine, singing her heart out in front of about 350 people. I knew she had a pretty voice but I didn’t know how beautiful it really is because I had never heard her sing like this before. This was her debut and she looked and sounded like an experienced professional. I had earlier fought back tears when I entrusted Mary to Michael, but I couldn’t hold them back listening to Grace sing. It was a beautiful moment.

I was able to curb the tears before honoring the next place on Mary’s dance card – the father/daughter dance. For years Mary told me she wanted us to dance to Paul Simon’s Fathers and Daughters, and we did. I think the only thing that kept me from losing it was that my happiness for her overcame my own sentimentality. Still, we both knew, “As long as one and one are two, there could never be a father who loved his daughter more than I love you”. That kind of love can only be a gift from God.

So, to my bible study buddies, “Sorry, guys, I lied. On second thought, I did have a God-moment….or two…or fifteen”.

I Am New – Part 2: The Turning Point

10 Sunday Nov 2013

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Renewal

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Tags

Faith, Grace, HolySpirit, Love, Prayer, Renewal

(In I Am New – Part 1: A Product of Secularity, I gave you a brief tour of the first fifty-five years of my life. I left you hanging at the point where, in order to get my life back on track, I decided to participate in a Christ Renews His Parish retreat weekend at St. Francis de Sales Catholic Church in Lebanon, Ohio, in April 2012.)

Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect when I arrived at church that Saturday morning ready to spend the day and night, and then most of Sunday on the retreat. I found myself throughout the day thinking hard about what I was experiencing, and questioning my long established notions about religion. As Saturday progressed, I felt a change coming over me. What I was experiencing was coming from the heart of all these men who were from all walks of life – even scientists, and engineers like me. They had such conviction. They had a contagious faith like I had never seen before. It was pure down to earth sharing on a personal level, witnessing to Christ and sharing their lives and their experiences that had brought them closer to God.

On Saturday evening we were invited into the chapel for prayer. I had been worried about this because I didn’t know how to pray. But, I decided to participate because I had just returned the night before from a visit with my parents, my sister and her family in Missouri. My sister has a daughter who was 13 at the time and who was born severely mentally and physically handicapped. Every time I visited I would leave saddened from thinking about their struggles in life. I was frustrated I didn’t know what to do about it, but yet grateful that my own children were normal. And so, I asked for help in praying for my niece, my sister, and for myself. I sat there and, as these men, led by our Deacon, prayed for me, I felt in my heart something happen. I felt free of the guilt I’d had because my sister’s child was handicapped and mine were not, and I felt released to be able to show more compassion for them instead of hiding from it.

When they had finished their prayer for my niece, my sister and me, I heard another man, whom I hardly knew, say to God, “I know Jerry is out of his comfort zone this weekend. Please, Lord, help him to feel Your presence and fill his heart with Your love. And, Lord, it would be wonderful if you could do it in the next five days.” Little did I know that this man, who was so bold to give God a deadline, and who I now consider to be one of my dearest friends and confidants, had a direct pipeline to Him. After they all wore themselves out praying for me I stuck around and participated in the prayers for the others. It’s difficult to describe the feeling I had other than to say I found a tremendous sense of fulfillment in doing so.

Ezekiel 36:26 – I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.

That night as I was getting ready for bed I found my friend Eric doing the same. We fell into a conversation about the day. He knew I wasn’t Catholic and that I had never been deeply religious. I confessed to him what an impact the day had had upon me. I said, “I’m trying, man, I really am. But I don’t know how. This is uncharted territory for me.” I explained how I consciously live my life by trying to incorporate into it Christian principles like: fidelity, compassion, integrity, self-discipline, respect, and service to others, but yet I’ve never felt the pull to make that leap of faith. I had been so profoundly affected by what I had witnessed that day, I knew there must be something else – something more that I was missing. He said, “My friend, you’re basically there already, you’re doing everything the Lord wants you to do and you’re doing it well. Keep your heart and mind open and let the Lord come to you, don’t try to reason him out of the picture.”

I headed downstairs to bed but I was on an emotional high. I thought about what Eric had said. Call it a revelation, or that the message had sunk in, but I finally accepted that I just needed to stop resisting and make the leap of faith and believe. I needed to be like Nike and just do it.

Laying there on my cot, I got to thinking more about the praying done earlier in the chapel. I asked, “What would I pray for if I was praying for myself?” That answer was easy. First, that my wife and daughters know how much I love them. And second, that I get some reinforcement from them that they also love me.

With my mind spinning out of control from all the emotional stimuli it was trying to digest, I couldn’t lie there any longer. I then did something so out of the ordinary that I even surprised myself. I tip-toed back upstairs and I walked through the doors into the church and I took a seat a few rows from the back on Joseph’s side. I bowed my head and I prayed for those two things. I asked to get better at expressing my love for my family, and I asked for help to see the signs of their love. When I looked up I discovered there were two other people also in the church: one was Eric and the other the wife of a new friend. What I didn’t know was that they were both praying for me to accept the Holy Spirit’s Gift of Faith.

Matthew 7:7-8 – Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

That Christ Renews His Parish retreat weekend was just five days before my 55^th birthday. In the hours between my prayers that night and my birthday, I received letters from all four daughters and my wife telling me how much they love me, how much they’ve always loved me and, for the icing on the cake, how they have always known my love for them. I’m telling you, as I read each letter I cried like a baby. It was like a huge weight had been lifted from my heart. I had been dreaming of this for years without uttering a word to anyone and all of a sudden I was receiving everything I had dreamed of. This couldn’t have been coincidence. Something else was going on, something else that I had never experienced before. Although I didn’t understand it at the time, from what I had gleaned from the men on the retreat this something else was called the Holy Spirit.

We’ve all heard the saying, “I’ll believe it when I see it.” I read somewhere that the definition of faith is having the attitude of, “I’ll see it when I believe it.” All those arguments which, for three decades, had me conflicted just disappeared. I see it now because I believe it. I know now that with faith, I don’t need evidence.

Romans 4:16 – …. it depends on faith, so that it may be a gift, and the promise may be guaranteed to all his descendants, not to those who only adhere to the law but to those who follow the faith of Abraham….

The weekend was also the catalyst I needed to make new friends. And I made several friendships that I know will last my lifetime. I needed this. You know, Jesus had his twelve disciples but he had his three closest friends in Peter, James and John. With them he shared a deeper and more personal relationship. We all need this.

I found the affirmation of love from my daughters for which I had prayed, and I found the new friendships I had been seeking. But the most important things I found that weekend were not things I came looking for. I found a relationship with Christ, and I found God’s love for me. It was truly an awesome discovery!

Near the closing of the weekend we talked about where we would go from there. After the weekend and after receiving those letters I was on a high like you wouldn’t believe. I had found the spiritual-ness I had been denying. I couldn’t let it end there. The first thing I did was volunteer for the next Giving Team. I felt I needed to be a disciple and that I needed to give back. And, then, I made an even bigger decision. For thirty-one years I had been sitting on the sidelines observing my wife and children go to church. I decided that what an old friend once told me, that I was “Catholic but just didn’t know it yet”, was true, and that it was time to get in the game. I signed up for the next RCIA (Right of Christian Initiation for Adults) session as soon as I could. I was baptized and confirmed into the Church at the Easter Vigil Mass this year. Since that retreat weekend nineteen months ago I have missed only one Sunday Mass. I pray every day, usually more than once. I’m still not great at praying but I think I’m getting better. I read scripture almost every day. I can’t imagine not doing these things. In addition to prayer, I have become active in our parish community. I participate in the CRHP ministry, I am a member of two committees, and I regularly attend two bible study programs. I’m loving every minute of it!

Ephesians 4:22-24 – …that you should put away the old self of your former way of life, corrupted through deceitful desires, and be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and put on the new self, created in God’s way in righteousness and holiness of truth.

I have had so many things happen to me in the last year and a half that continue to convince me that God is present in my life and that Christ is walking the path with me that there’s absolutely no doubt in my mind that “the juice has been worth the squeeze”. Since that weekend, life is different. It’s better. Not just marginally, but by orders of magnitude. I feel at peace more than ever before and it feels good to help other people. It feels good to pray for them when they are hurting. I count my blessings every day and I am amazed at what I used to call coincidences. I now call them God moments and I discover them everywhere.

I am still learning and growing in my faith. I pay close attention to several men and women who seem to me to lead extraordinarily spiritual lives. And, I try to find ways to put my new Christian principles into action. One particular instance is, I think, worth sharing. On August 21st of last year my Dad turned eighty years old. My sibs and I were trying to figure out what to get a guy who has everything he needs. Then I thought about my weekend experience and that he might like to know that his children love him and that they know he loves them. I suggested we write him love letters such as I had received from my daughters. Everyone agreed. I wrote mine and I cried the whole time I was writing it. There were a couple decades of saved up “I love you’s” in that three page letter. He said it was the best birthday present he had ever received. I didn’t realize, however, that I was giving myself a gift, too, in the realization that I desperately needed to write that letter for my own sake. As Jesus intended, love isn’t worth much unless you give it away.

There you have it. Since I’ve left my old life behind, I sometimes wonder where my new life will take me. I’m pretty sure I’m finally heading in the right direction. One thing’s for sure, it feels good to have my family and many new friends helping me down that spiritual path. And, although I am tremendously humbled by it, it feels good to be asked to help them as well.

Well, I know I accomplished at least the first part of my goal for this post. I’m fired up even more than I thought I would be about preparing for the next CRHP weekend. It’s my hope that I have been as successful with the second part of my goal – to bring you closer to God by letting you see how the Holy Spirit changed a non-believer like me, and how, as a result of His Grace and my acceptance of His Gift of Faith, I Am New.

If you have a personal story of conversion, of renewal in Christ, or of how God has touched you that you would like to share, please feel free to comment. I would love to hear from you.

God Bless You All.

The Cradle of Faith in Ohio

10 Tuesday Sep 2013

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Churches, Eucharistic Adoration, Prayer

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

Eucharistic Adoration, Prayer

“Even a blind hog finds an acorn every now and then.”

I wish I could remember from whom I heard that adage some thirty plus years ago. It had to have been a wise old man who’s long gone by now. It’s the way I felt today, like the blind hog finding a wonderful acorn.

For seven years I have been traveling once or twice a month to a satellite office just south of Somerset, Ohio (ESE of Columbus about an hour). And each of those 100 or so times I have traveled the same route to and from that office. But, this morning there was construction on Highway 22 going east into Somerset so I decided to take a different route coming home. Instead of turning left out of the gate I turned right and, like in Robert Frost’s poem, The Road Not Taken, “I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” I popped over the first hill only about a half mile from my office and approached the intersection with OH Rte. 383. I looked to my right to see if any traffic was approaching when I saw, towering over a clump of trees, a tall church tower. It appeared old and was constructed of red brick. Interested, I turned right instead of left, and drove the few hundred yards to where I could get a better view. The church sat back from the road about 200 yards and was perched on a rather high knoll with a winding driveway up to the church. Next to the highway was a graveled area in front of the tree covered hill leading up to the church with a sign proclaiming this to be St. Joseph’s Church, the oldest Catholic Church in Ohio, Founded 1818.

There was also a sign installed by the Ohio Historical Society which read,

FIRST CATHOLIC CHURCH IN OHIO

St. Joseph Church, “Cradle of the Faith in Ohio”, was the first Catholic Church in the state. Dominican Father, Edward Fenwick, later the first bishop of Cincinnati, came from Kentucky to visit local Catholics for the first time in 1808. Led by Jacob Dittoe, six Catholic families bought this half section of land and built an 18 by 22 foot log church. Dittoe deeded the 320 acres to Fenwick, who blessed the church on December 6, 1818. Located near Zane’s Trace, the church attracted German, Irish and Alsatia Catholic settlers and became the mission center for southern and central Ohio. The present structure, the third on the site, was dedicated in 1843 and rebuilt in 1866 after an 1864 fire.

Here was this beautiful church, sitting on a tree covered hill surrounded by nothing but corn fields, with the hamlet of Somerset being the nearest cluster of civilization about six miles to the north. I felt as though I had just unearthed a lost treasure.

St. Joseph’s Church near Somerset, OH

I was intrigued. I love old churches and I needed to see if St. Joseph’s was open for a look-see inside. I pulled up into a circle drive at the foot of a long flight of stairs to the front door and parked. After climbing the stairs I was actually surprised to find the huge wooden front door slightly ajar. With anticipation I pulled the door open and poked my head inside. It was beautiful! Painted vaulted ceilings supported by huge pillars extended the full length from front to back. Beautiful, intricate stained glass windows lined both sides of the church. There were about twenty pews per side, each of which would sit about eight to ten worshipers. A huge pipe organ graced the loft in the back of the church over the entrance. All the pews were solid oak (no veneer in this place!) as was the hardwood floor and the altar, chairs, ambo, and carved, arched screens on either side of the altar separating the choir areas. And, I had it all to myself.

St. Joseph’s Church, near Somerset OH

Today is Tuesday. To put what happened next into context, let me back up and describe what’s been going on in my life the last few days. Last Thursday I had knee surgery so I was off work on Friday. I took that opportunity to post Finding Grace through Eucharistic Adoration. On Saturday morning I went to Mass and did my hour of Adoration with the Eucharist exposed. On Sunday after Mass, I had brunch with Fr. Sean Davidson who has been visiting our parish to help us establish Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration. On Monday evening, I attended a meeting to organize those same efforts, again with Fr. Sean. So, it was no surprise for me, then, upon finding myself alone in this magnificent old historical church, to decide to spend my lunch hour in Eucharistic Adoration. The bronze tabernacle was in its place behind the altar and the red candle was burning signifying the Blessed Host was in its home.

I took a seat in the front pew on Mary’s side such that I could kneel on my left knee and still be able to keep my right leg extended. It was so quiet. Aside from the constant tinnitus in my ears and my own breathing, there was total silence. If there was any traffic on the highway, I was far enough off the road not to hear it. Once or twice I heard the old structure creak. It was just me and Jesus. I gave thanks and prayed for His help. I prayed for grace for our parish in our efforts to establish Eucharistic Adoration. I prayed for my family, for friends who are struggling, for the unborn and new parents to be, for peace in the Middle East and for guidance to our nation’s, and other nations’, leaders with respect to the looming conflict escalation in Syria, for peace and comfort to all those who remember and were affected by the tragedy in New York City twelve years ago tomorrow. I didn’t have my bible but I had my cell phone so I called up my app and read today’s readings from Colossians (Col 2:6-15) and Luke (Lk 6:12-19) and meditated on them. I had never read Colossians before so I read all four chapters. And then I just sat there in silence and listened and experienced the peace and solitude of being in the presence of Christ. It was a beautiful thing. In the hour and ten minutes I was there I didn’t see or hear another soul.

This experience was truly a “God Moment”, one of those times when God comes into your life unexpectedly. I almost didn’t go to Somerset this morning because of my knee still not being fully functional. If it hadn’t been for the road construction I would have taken the route I’ve taken scores of times before. No, this was definitely a God Moment, these things were meant to happen today. I was meant to discover St. Joseph’s Church, the oldest Catholic Church in Ohio, the “Cradle of the Faith in Ohio.”

Finding Grace through Eucharistic Adoration

07 Saturday Sep 2013

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Eucharistic Adoration, Prayer

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

Blessed Sacrament, Eucharist, Eucharistic Adoration, Jesus, Prayer

Back in July when I drove my car solo from Cincinnati, Ohio to my daughter’s wedding in Seattle, Washington, a drive of 2,640 miles over 40 hours of driving in four days, I posted thoughts, observances and inspirations on Reflections of a Lay Catholic each day. It had been years since I had made a drive like this on my own and, even though I would miss my wife and youngest daughter (who were flying to Seattle), I was looking forward to it immensely. Mainly I was looking forward to the quiet time, the absence of work and other responsibilities that tend to fill up my life. And, at some point it dawned on me that it would be a good opportunity for me, in my new found faith, to try to get closer to Jesus, to spend some one-on-one time with Him. After three days of driving and blogging about: attending Masses at the Cathedral Basilica in St. Louis, Missouri, St. Joseph’s Cathedral in Sioux Falls, South Dakota (including confession), and St. Therese the Little Flower church in Rapid City, South Dakota; the inspiring and friendly people I met at each church; praying the Rosary for the first time on my own, and seeing the beautiful countryside that is God’s creation, I felt I needed to explain why I was praying my way across America. So, in my post from day three, Bolo Ties, Rosaries and Rainbows, I explained that there were many people in my life who needed my prayers, one of which was my wife who would soon be having breast cancer surgery. And, I explained, that I tend to do my best praying, or at least it seems that way to me, while I am in church. I found, too, that the prolonged absences of distraction while I was behind the wheel allowed me to continue that praying throughout the day. A friend and follower, when reading that I was enjoying this alone time with Jesus, astutely claimed that it may very well have been that my whole trip unfolded in this way because He needed some alone time with me!

Don’t you love it when something simple gets turned around and you discover something even more beautiful than what you originally had?

In another recent post I mentioned how praying is something I’m still getting used to doing. I’m satisfied with the frequency but it’s the content that needs some work. I tend to ramble. I need to be more succinct so I can fit it all in when I only have a short amount of time. I have found, though, that my time in prayer is tremendously more satisfying, with less pressure on myself to “perform”, when I schedule to spend a full hour in Eucharistic Adoration once a week.

Before I go any farther, I realize there may be a few non-Catholics reading this and they may not have a good grasp of the significance of the Eucharist in our faith. So, let me say a few words about that. Catholics believe the bread and wine, the consecrated Hosts, are actually the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Christ. While many Christian denominations have a service that commemorates the Last Supper, with some distributing bread and wine (or grape juice) as a symbol, it is our belief that the Eucharist (the Blessed Body and Blood) is the real presence of Christ. The basis for this belief is found in Matthew 26:26-28:

So, what is Eucharistic Adoration you ask? Well, let’s say that while receiving the Eucharist during Communion at Mass is the best way to personally experience Christ within our parish community, Eucharistic Adoration gives us the opportunity to be with Him up close and personal, or one-on-one. We can experience this in two ways. The Consecrated Hosts reserved from the previous Mass are kept in the tabernacle, usually a small, ornate enclosure with a locking door resting on a table behind the altar. The easiest and most common form of Eucharistic Adoration is to stop by church at any time and genuflect (kneel) facing the tabernacle and acknowledge Christ’s presence.

A typical tabernacle

The second way, and in my opinion the most profound and satisfying way, is when the Blessed Sacrement is removed from the tabernacle and exposed for adoration in a monstrance, a sculpture with a glass enclosure that reveals the Host. Like the first example, adoration is accomplished by genuflecting in Christ’s presence and it is usually done for an hour. What is significant about an hour, you ask? Well, that comes from when Jesus, after agonizing in the Garden of Gethsemane, finds his disciples sleeping. Upon waking them He asks Peter, “So you could not keep watch with me for one hour?” – Matthew 26:40.

Poor Peter, he couldn’t seem to get anything right. Sometimes I feel like him. Do you?

Pope Francis I with a monstrance

I have had the opportunity on two occasions to spend an hour in adoration when the Blessed Sacrament was exposed. Both of those instances were during Christ Renews His Parish retreat weekends. But, this summer, I have spent several more hours on Saturday mornings in adoration, when the Eucharist was not exposed, as a time for sacrificial prayer in support of our church’s Adult Faith Formation group. One of the group’s responsibilities is to bring Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration back to the parish and in support of that effort we each take a day to fast and one hour a week to pray in adoration before the tabernacle. Our prayers are for help and encouragement to the parish community to discover the glory of adoration and for their participation. In order to have a successful program for a 24/7/365 Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration about 450 people are needed to participate.

Regardless of the reason I am in adoration, I always feel a sense of calmness, of comfort, and my thoughts come to me more clearly. I find when I am spilling my guts to, or just having a casual one-sided conversation with, Jesus, my words flow much easier than at any other time of prayer. Sometimes I am quiet and just soak up being in His presence. In author Kathleen Carroll’s words, “The best kind of friend is the one with whom you can spend time without having to say anything. You can just share the moment and enjoy each other’s company, knowing your relationship is deeper than the spoken word. That kind of silent communication is what takes place between you and Jesus when you participate in Eucharistic Adoration.”

The first couple times I spent an hour in adoration I knelt the whole time and actually spent the whole hour having a one-sided conversation with Jesus. That was hard to do, especially for an old man’s arthritic knees. And I would run out of things to say so I would repeat myself which made me feel a little stupid. After the second time, though, I observed other adorers spending about half their time kneeling and the other half sitting. I asked and learned that this was okay and that it was okay to not spend the entire hour in prayer. It is okay to spend time simply gazing at the Host, soaking up being in the presence of Jesus. It is okay to sit and consider the life of Christ and what He might say to you in light of your circumstances in life. It is okay to just sit and listen. Listen for that still small voice, that bit of clarity that will give you the direction for which you’ve been searching. It’s okay to bring your bible and read passages from it, or your prayer book from which you might recite some prayers special to the moment. And, I have found the more I spend that one hour a week in the presence of Jesus I tend to agree more and more with Mother Teresa’s sentiments, “The time you spend with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is the best time you will spend on earth. Each moment that you spend with Jesus will deepen your union with Him and make your soul everlastingly more glorious and beautiful in Heaven, and will help bring about everlasting peace on earth.”

Most adults I know are married, have a significant other, and/or have children. Imagine the sadness we would have if we couldn’t spend at least one hour a week with the ones we love more than any others on earth. Then, imagine the ridiculousness of accepting that it would be okay to not schedule at least one hour a week to devote to the one’s you love the most. Now convey those thoughts over to our relationship with Christ. Can we not spend one hour per week getting to know Him better and letting Him help us get to know ourselves better? By doing so, will we not be able to love our families and friends here on earth more fully?

Some of you reading this might be from someplace far away from my home parish in Ohio. If so, and your parish offers the opportunity for Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration, I hope you will find it in yourself to give it a try. If your parish doesn’t, try to find one nearby that does and give it a try. I believe you will be amazed at the deeper devotion to Jesus you will experience. Then bring it back to your own parish. For those of you reading this who are in my home parish, I ask that you consider joining us in our effort to establish Perpetual Adoration and become one of the 450 people needed to make it become a reality. We are hosting Fr. Sean Davidson of the Missionaries of the Most Holy Eucharist this weekend and he will be giving brief homilies about the beauty of Eucharistic Adoration at each Mass followed by a mission talk next Tuesday. Please join us. I believe you will find, as Fr. Davidson says, “The adoration of Jesus in the Eucharist also leads to greater reverence at Mass, a deeper desire for personal holiness, and a stronger sense of union with the parish and the whole Church.”

When we get this off the ground, my hour is going to be from 5:00 until 6:00 a.m. on Monday mornings. You’re welcome to come join me.

Good night and God Bless.

The Light of Hope in Christian Community

20 Tuesday Aug 2013

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Faith, Hope, Love, Prayer

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Faith, Hope, Love, Prayer

Light of Hope

It’s been almost four weeks since my last post. Much has transpired since then and it’s been a roller coaster of emotions at times. In The Other Side of Prayer Requests, I left you hanging with the news that someone special to me had been diagnosed with a disease that would require surgery the next day, and that I had asked friends and family to pray for us. I probably should not have been quite so vague but I suppose I was holding on to that last shred of privacy. The rest of the story eventually came out when I replied to comments posted by friends. In case you missed that thread, that special someone was my wife, Melinda, who was diagnosed with breast cancer and had to have a lumpectomy on 24 July, our thirty-first wedding anniversary.

Ever since she was diagnosed on 31 May, I had been praying for her healing harder than I had ever prayed for anything in my short history of praying. Although the lump was small, we didn’t know if the cancer may have spread or if it was localized. My biggest fear was that cancer cells would be found in her lymph nodes, indicating a spread that would require chemotherapy. So, when I asked others, or they offered, to pray for her, I asked specifically for prayers that no cancer would be found in her lymph nodes. Personally, I prayed that when the final pathology report came back they would find no cancer at all and she would be pronounced “cancer-free”.

In spite of my praying, both Melinda and I had an uncanny feeling of optimism, that everything was going to be alright, that all the prayers being registered on her behalf from a legion of experienced prayer warriors were being heard. As I mentioned, we had “a confident assurance from an entire faith community who seemed to be saying they had inside information.” I also took comfort in a passage from a book of daily reflections by St. Augustine:

“Be assured that all your diseases will be healed. Have no fear. You may say that your diseases are powerful; but this physician is more powerful. There is no disease that the Almighty Physician cannot cure. Just allow yourself to be healed and do not reject His healing hands. He knows what He is doing.” – Commentary on Psalm 72

So, cutting to the chase, Melinda had her surgery on Wednesday and the early report was there was no cancer found in the lymph nodes, nor in the marginal tissue around the tumor. But, we had to wait until the following Monday before the official pathology report was completed. That was a long and anxious five days. On Monday we received the news that, indeed, no cancer was found in her lymph nodes, nor the marginal tissue around the tumor…. and none in the tumor itself! This was precisely what I had been praying for. Praise God!

My intention with this post is not for it to be a play by play of my wife’s surgery. Rather, it is a testament to the power of Christian Community. It is difficult for me to describe the way we felt about the tremendous support, caring and prayers we received during this ordeal. There is no doubt in my mind we would have been unable to sustain such strong confidence, such unwavering faith in the healing power of prayer had we gone it alone and not reached out to our community of friends and family, people who care for and love us, and asked them for their prayers. The outpouring of love and the demonstration of faith from everyone gave us something special – it gave us hope. And, I believe, it was this powerful combination of practicing the three theological virtues that brought about the miracle of a clean and cancer-free diagnosis for Melinda.

I had heard witnesses about Christian Community from men on the Christ Renews retreats on which I had been. But, especially for someone like me who is new to this life, you don’t know what you don’t know until your eyes are opened by a personal experience. I witnessed so many examples of love and caring I feel compelled and obligated to mention some of them:

To all those who prayed with an intensity honed by years of practice that I can only hope to achieve one day; to those who went the extra mile and sacrificed and fasted on Melinda’s behalf, who prayed Rosaries and Novenas specifically for the two of us, I give you my utmost gratitude.

We had a promising indication that all would be well when the surgeon surprised us and asked us to pray with him for healing and for God to guide him during the procedure.

I was overwhelmed with the caring and love expressed by so many asking how Melinda’s surgery went and how she was recovering. It was honest, look-you-straight-in-the-eye concern followed by sincere hugs borne of relief. Your love was truly felt by both of us.

To Melinda’s sister, Carol, who traveled from Texas to be here for both moral and physical support for Melinda, our daughter Grace, and me, many thanks, you were a God-send.

A special group of people took it upon themselves to unselfishly prepare dinners for us during the two weeks between Melinda’s surgery and the completion of her two-a-day radiation treatments. Thank you all for the plentiful and delicious meals, they were wonderful and so welcome! I still plan to hit you up for the recipes.

For someone who is both unfamiliar and uncomfortable with receiving so much love and assistance from others I have been totally humbled by the overwhelming support and encouragement to open up and share my emotions instead of keeping them bottled up inside me. Your prayers not only helped heal Melinda, they also healed me.

One thing that helped me open up and receive this kindness was understanding and acceptance of another bit of advice given by St. Augustine:

“For when we are harassed by poverty, saddened by bereavement, ill, or in pain, let good friends visit us. Let them be persons who not only can rejoice with those who rejoice but can weep with those who weep. Let them be persons who know how to give useful advice and how to win us to express our own feelings in conversation. – (Letter 130)

To close, please accept mine and Melinda’s gratitude for your gifts of prayer for her healing. And, specifically from me, please know my appreciation for your example of Christian Community by showing this neophyte how to shine the Light of Hope as suggested by our Lord, Jesus Christ:

“You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world – like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. – Matthew 5:13-16

God Bless you and thank you for being our Light of Hope.

The Other Side of Prayer Requests

23 Tuesday Jul 2013

Posted by Jerry Robinson in Love, Prayer

≈ 14 Comments

Tags

Community, Prayer

Back on 15 April my friend and co-contributor, Rich Brewers, posted How We Respond to Prayer Requests. His post came just two weeks after my official conversion and entry into the Church. I admit that, subsequent to reading his thoughts, praying for others was an action for which I only had about a year’s experience. I simply didn’t know how to pray prior to the singular event which led to my decision to become Catholic. Any prayers I might have intended to offer before this time really couldn’t be considered to be much more than best wishes.

That event was my first Christ Renews His Parish retreat weekend. During the weekend I had the opportunity to pray for others and be prayed over by others. Not really knowing how to do the former, I chose to do the latter. I had a compelling reason. I had just returned the night before from an Easter week visit with family in Missouri. My sister has a 14 year old daughter who is both mentally and physically handicapped. With every visit I would leave saddened knowing that their struggles in life are incomprehensible to me, and frustrated that I didn’t know what I could do about it. This had bothered me for a long time and, so, even though I barely knew these men, I asked them for their prayers for my niece, my sister, and for myself. One of the men praying for me was Jim, the gentleman Rich referred to in his post. I sat in the chair with his and other men’s hands on me and they prayed for the three of us. In my heart I felt something happen in that chapel. I wasn’t sure what it was but it was certainly nothing I had ever experienced before. I was shaken. I thought maybe it was simply the sincerity and love of these fine men. But, I came to realize it was the Holy Spirit working through them. It was such a powerful experience I decided to stick around and participate in the prayers for other men. I’m not sure I can describe the feeling other than to say I found a tremendous sense of fulfillment in doing so.

I believe one of the most difficult obstacles to asking others to pray for you is the fear of appearing weak or of lacking control. What other obstacles might prevent you from asking someone else for their prayers for you?

Since that experience I have had several opportunities to pray for other people both with and without their requests. I’m still not very good at it but I think I’m getting better. I try to pay attention and learn from role models, like Jim and Rich, who make it seem so easy. I’ve also learned that, like golf, to get better at praying you have to spend more time praying. Thus, I usually have two or three intentions on my list at all times and I pray for them daily. I find deep satisfaction in this. Although I may not always see any direct results which can be attributed to my prayers, I have faith they are being heard and the intended recipient will be affected in some positive way. And, somewhat selfishly, I find my time in prayer, even for others, allows me to get closer to Jesus.

But, there is another side to prayer requests – the side of requesting people to pray for you and your loved ones. It’s not as easy as you might think it would be. In many ways, it’s more difficult than responding to prayer requests from others. Such was my case. Up until about a month ago, I had been focused on praying for the needs of others. I never really considered that I would have another significant reason to request their prayers. But, then, one never expects the person whom you love the most to become ill with a disease that requires surgery and further treatment. We discovered what a scary proposition it really is. When we got the news, we, like many folks, thought we would keep it to ourselves. No need to burden others with our situation, right? We thought we might tell one or two people who ought to know. But, then, we decided that sooner or later those one or two people would feel the need to tell someone else and eventually everyone who you didn’t want to burden would eventually learn of it anyway, or be hurt that they were the only ones who had not heard. And, then, fortunately, we turned the table and looked at the situation from the outside in – what would we want if we were a friend or family member of the afflicted? We realized that we would certainly want to know about it for no other reason than we love the person and would wish to pray for them and ask for Jesus’ intercession and healing. We have a large family relatively speaking (pun intended), but our parish family of loved ones is much larger. After realizing we could use all the requests for divine assistance we could get, we decided to let the cat out of the bag.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation seemingly out of your control and hoping for a miracle? Have you kept it to yourself? Or have you sought prayers from others?

Spreading news like this via word of mouth, especially through people who you know love and care about you, is a wonderful thing! It doesn’t take long. By the time I got around to making the official request to be added to our parish’s prayer chain, most folks already knew and had been praying for a while. How do we know? We can feel it. It is the sense of peace that has come over us, the sense that everything is going to be alright, and the feeling that we are in Good Hands. It is in the comforting smiles and the reassuring hugs. It is a feeling borne from knowing that so many people have said rosaries, novenas, offered personal prayers, fasted and made other sacrifices on our behalf. It is the collective, confident assurance from an entire faith community who seem to be saying they have inside information.

If you have requested others to pray for you for personal reasons, how did you feel? Was your faith strengthened? Were you comforted?

Thus, here we are on the eve of the prescribed surgery and I believe we could not have a more positive outlook, feel more at peace with the outcome, or more accepting that this is just a bump in the highway of life. We know we have our immediate families and our extended parish family and friends who will all be pulling for us tomorrow. We have faith in God and the healing power of prayer. Please know that your love and heart-felt prayers are indeed felt and appreciated. We love you.

God Bless you all.